


A Beautiful Mistake

by bluesfortheredj



Category: Jamestown (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gwilym Lee Character, Jamestown - Freeform, Samuel Castell - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2020-07-10 01:54:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 30,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19897960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluesfortheredj/pseuds/bluesfortheredj





	1. Chapter 1

“Name.”

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N).”

The man looks down the list of names for yours to see who was taking you, then taps the parchment with the quill when he finds it.

“James Read,” he calls out as he looks into the crowd of men by the river bank, all waiting for their women to be announced to them. A man catches your eye as he smiles at you and your heart skips a beat at the sight of him, but then another man steps forward from the throng of people and announces himself as James Read. The other man’s smile fades as James steps past him towards you and you tear your eyes away to look at the man you were meant to marry in a matter of days.

“Hello,” he nods.

“Hello,” you reply meekly as he picks up your sack of belongings and throws it over his shoulder.

“This way,” he nods.

He doesn’t seem as brutish as some of the other men leering at the women coming off of the boat, but he’s covered in soot and already has a tendency to avoid your gaze. You take a quick look back at the man who had caught your eye before and he’s looking your way with a sad look on his face before a woman hands him a glove for his betrothed. He’s soon distracted by the announcement of his name and you see Jocelyn walking confidently towards him which makes your stomach turn.

“This is it,” James sighs when you get to his small shack, “I, er, you take the bed until we’re… I’ll take the floor.”

“I’ve been sleeping on the floor of a boat for the past few days, I think I can handle this,” you smile, and he shakes his head.

“Nah, nah, take the bed. I’ve got to get back to work.”

With that, he disappears out of the front door leaving you alone in this strange environment with only a small bag of your possessions for company. You slide the bag underneath the bed to get it out of the way then sit yourself down for a moment as your eyes wander to the small window where you can see people walking by outside. The man you saw earlier strides past with Jocelyn on his arm and she has that smug look you’d seen as soon as she got on the boat.

When they walk out of view you’re left staring straight at the small hut James evidently works out of, and you watch him as his blackened hands work skilfully on the metals he manipulates into shape. You stand and go to the window for a clearer view, and he catches your eye; quickly looking away shyly and getting back to his work. He was unlike the other men here, you could already tell, and there was a vulnerability to him that saddened you when you thought about the people he’d had to live with for the past few years. You make your way towards the door with a sigh, then go out to see if he wanted something to drink or eat.

“Read!” a gruff voice calls out to him, and James turns to speak to the man approaching him. You notice the man from earlier coming up behind them on his own now and as you both stare at each other, you step into a puddle of mud and end up slipping and landing on your bum in the dirt with a thud. The man runs to your side as James is kept occupied, and he squats down next to you with a concerned frown.

“Are you okay, Miss…?” he asks as he offers you his hand.

“Please, call me (Y/N). I’m fine, it’s nothing,” you smile, your ego bruised more than anything else, “thank you, um...”

“Castell, Samuel Castell, I’m the company recorder here,” he smiles kindly as he helps you to your feet.

“Thank you, Sir.”

“Samuel, please.”

“Thank you, Samuel. Oh, how very embarrassing. So sorry,” you mutter as you straighten out your dress as best you can.

“Do not be sorry (Y/N), it cannot be helped. Do you need any help back to your living quarters?” he asks as his hands linger on your arm.

“What’s happened?” James asks quietly but hoarsely as he approaches the two of you.

“I fell,” you blush, “Mr. Castell kindly helped me.”

“You alright?” James frowns.

“I’m fine, honestly, I was just coming to see you.”

“Right. I’ll walk you over then.”

“Thank you again Samuel,” you nod as you slide your arm away from his touch and hold onto James instead.

“You’re very welcome, (Y/N),” he smiles and you already feel your heart splitting in two as one half stays with him while he reluctantly walks away.

Jocelyn had surely struck it lucky with him and it upset you that someone like her were allowed to have such happiness. You’d heard her on the boat talking to Alice; she had to leave England because she killed a man, so how was it fair that she was to be married to such a kind hearted and handsome man such as Samuel? The remnants of your heart sink as you walk towards James’ shack and he sits you on a stool while he gets to work.

“Sure you’re okay?” he asks between hitting the metal.

“Of course,” you smile.

James was a kind man as well, there were no two ways about it, and you felt horrible for thinking about another man while you sat there watching him work. He didn’t deserve this at all and judging by the other men walking by with narrowed stares directed right at you, you’d definitely consider yourself lucky to be betrothed to him. Just not lucky enough for Samuel, however.

“How long have you been here?” you ask as he hangs up a horseshoe.

“Since the beginning.”

“Are the other men-”

“The other men are not to be trusted, especially around pretty women. You are not to go near them alone, you understand? Castell is only one of a handful I trust.”

“I understand,” you nod.

James studies your face, now etched with the smallest amount of fear at his raised voice as he spoke about the other men and although you could understand what he meant, it didn’t change the fact you’d only been here a matter of hours and the man you were meant to be marrying was talking like this already. It was a different world here and the men had been alone together for too long, even though this was no excuse for him to speak to you like he did, and James sighs as he walks towards you slowly.

“I’m sorry,” he breathes, “I didn’t mean to… I know these men all too well, (Y/N).”

“I do understand, James. It’s okay. I’m a little tired from the journey, is it okay if I sleep for a while?”

“Of course it is. Do you need me to walk you?”

“I’ll jump the puddle this time,” you smile, and his face softens noticeably even under all dirt that covers his features.

Jamestown was meant to be a new beginning for you and although the thought of the unknown had been exciting on the boat, but now it was rather a frightening one, and you already know that it’s going to be an uneasy time as you settle in here. If only you hadn’t caught sight of Samuel when you arrived, then maybe you wouldn’t have this gut feeling that things wouldn’t necessarily go to plan for you and James.


	2. Chapter 2

Two days in to your new life and you’d managed to convince James to share the bed so that you both got a chance to sleep in it on alternating nights, and affectionate touches between the both of you had come naturally, especially being as James was a man who had so much love inside his soul. You’d seen Samuel around the town and he always had a smile for you whenever you caught his eye, which only made your heart break that little bit more each time. Daily life had settled down to some extent, but there was always some drama or other happening around you, and Jamestown was never quiet.

You stand out in the sun just behind the house and start to peg your clothes out on a makeshift washing line put up by James while he works away in his shack, and as you reach down for the next item of clothing you notice a familiar pair of shoes standing right next to your washing basket.

“(Y/N),” Samuel smiles as he hands you a garment he’d taken off the top of the pile, “how are you feeling after your fall? I’ve been meaning to ask you.”

“Hello Samuel,” you nod as you take the piece of clothing and avoid his gaze as you peg it up clumsily, “I’m well thank you, how are you?”

“Excellent news. I’m also very well. How are you settling in to our community?”

“It has the potential to become home, that’s for sure,” you say as you continue to pin items to the clothes line.

Samuel hovers next to you then picks up another garment for you and as he hands it over your fingers brush against one another’s which sends a jolt through both of you as your eyes finally meet.

“When I saw you walk off that boat-”

“Samuel!” Jocelyn calls, interrupting him and your sweet moment.

You snatch the clothing away from him and hurriedly drape it over the washing line as Jocelyn makes her way over and links her arm through his in a move that screams to you that she has her claws firmly dug into him, and you have to fight to not roll your eyes at the sight.

“This looks cosy. What are you both talking about?”

“I was asking if (Y/N) was feeling okay after her fall the other day,” Samuel explains.

“Oh yes, I heard about that nasty fall. How awful!” she says, and her voice is thick with sarcasm, “well, we must be on our way dear Samuel. The Governor needs you.”

Samuel gives you a weak smile as he tears himself away from you to follow Jocelyn, but the looks he gives you over his shoulder tells you everything about what he was about to say. You so desperately wanted to hear it, but you were also terrified of facing the truth that you’d both fallen for one another as it would turn your lives upside down. Jocelyn ushers Samuel into the Governor’s quarters, then paces around outside until Mercy joins her and starts to talking enthusiastically. A few minutes later Samuel appears in the doorway and Jocelyn starts to stroll away with Mercy close behind.

You watch in horror as Jocelyn turns sharply and her hand sweeps across Mercy’s face causing her head to jolt to the side from the slap. Jocelyn walks away as if completely unfazed by the whole encounter and you see Samuel torn between going after his betrothed or to his loyal housekeeper. You run over to Mercy and hold her as she starts to cry, then you’re soon joined by Samuel who puts a hand on Mercy’s shoulder as she weeps against you.

“Mercy,” Samuel sighs, “are you okay?”

“Oh I’m fine master Castell,” she says as she raises her head from you while still crying, “I’m absolutely fine.”

“Mercy you’re very much not okay,” you frown as she tries to smile as Samuel.

“No, no I am. I promise I am Miss...”

“(Y/N), just (Y/N),” you smile kindly.

“You are so very kind (Y/N),” she sniffs.

Jocelyn returns seemingly to apologise but when she sees you three standing together, she huffs as she passes and Samuel gives you an apologetic look before he rushes after her.

“How about you come with me?” you offer to Mercy.

“I’d like that very much Miss (Y/N),” she nods as fresh tears prick her eyes.

Samuel’s gaze doesn’t leave you as you walk away with Mercy tucked under your arm and Jocelyn knows exactly where his mind is while she tries to gain his sympathy with her version of events.

“I’ve got such a bad headache,” she says dramatically as she purposely goes off balance to regain Samuel’s attention, “and Mercy’s rambling was incessant, I didn’t mean to do it...”

“Maybe you should go and see Christopher and get something for the pain while I check up on Mercy,” Samuel suggests.

“Yes, what a good idea,” Jocelyn smirks, knowing she was being directed straight into the arms of her lover.

Samuel finds you both in the house you share with James and you step outside to give him and Mercy space to talk. James nods for you to join him when you come out of the house, and you walk over to where he’s working to explain the situation.

“Why did she slap her, though?” he asks after you tell him about what you saw.

“I’m not sure, Mercy seems to think she’s done something terribly wrong but I highly doubt that. Look at her!” you say with a thoughtful expression on your face.

“You’re too kind, you know that, eh?” James smiles, and you feel yourself blushing, “don’t let no one take advantage of that.”

“I won’t,” you nod as you place a hand over his shirt and lean your head on his shoulder while he wraps an arm around you.

Affection was something James had been starved of for years and small touches like this were enough to make him tear up with joy, but he made sure nothing of the sort would come to the surface. Samuel appears in the doorway with Mercy close behind him and both you and James spring apart as he approaches you both.

“May I speak with (Y/N) for a moment, alone?” Samuel asks as he looks to James.

“Of course, you don’t need to ask for permission Castell,” he chuckles.

You walk away a few steps with Samuel then when you turn to face him and get a proper look into his beautiful blue eyes, your heart stops momentarily, and your breath catches in your throat. There’s a pause as Samuel realises that he’s with the wrong woman completely, and he looks sadly down at the ground before speaking.

“Thank you for being so kind to Mercy. She’s a fragile soul and your warmth means a lot to her after what happened.”

“She didn’t deserve that, I know injustice when I see it and I couldn’t leave her on her own,” you reply. Samuel’s heart swells at your words, not only were you beautiful but you were grounded, loyal, kind hearted, and had strong morals.

“James is a lucky man,” he replies; unable to say anything else that wouldn’t get him in trouble.

“You deserve better, Samuel,” you say, then immediately regret your words, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that, I-”

“You’re mesmerizing,” he sighs with a smile, “this is what I was trying to say earlier.”

This was a dangerous conversation being only feet away from your betrothed, and your eyes dart over to James where he’s working away, blissfully unaware of the words being spoken between you and Samuel. Jocelyn appears at the corner of your eye and she talks to Mercy before making her way over to you two.

“Samuel, dearest, we should get Mercy home. She’s been through an awful fright,” she pouts as she links her arm through Samuel’s once again.

“Of course. You two go ahead,” he nods, and she scowls at you before turning around and storming off with Mercy.

“You should go,” you say as you both stand there in a tense silence.

“Why is it that I feel like I should stay here?” he questions.

“Because it’s where you belong,” you find yourself saying boldly.

“It is,” he smiles, “it really is. Oh, (Y/N), we belong together.”

“I should go,” you say, your voice cracking with emotion.

Before Samuel can argue you’ve disappeared inside the house, leaving him feeling forlorn, and James oblivious to everything.


	3. Chapter 3

“What were you two talking about?” James asks as he sneaks up behind you in the house, making you jump into the air and drop his that shirt you were holding.

“James!” you gasp, “scared the life out of me!”

“Sorry,” he smiles, “quite the jump on you.”

“Easily frightened,” you chuckle, “what did you ask?”

“Just what you were talking to Castell about earlier. You ain’t gotta tell me.”

“He was just thanking me for taking care of Mercy, poor girl. She didn’t deserve that one bit, and she was so shaken by it,” you huff, getting angry again at the thought of what had happened.

“Hey, don’t worry about it,” James soothes, “you did more than most would do. I saw you running over there as soon as it happened, you didn’t have to do that but you did.”

“It just makes me so angry when someone like that thinks she can swan around and do what she wants,” you seethe, “she doesn’t deserve any of this!”

“Woah, calm down, it’s alright,” James says calmly.

He takes you in his arms and as you rest your head against his chest you begin to smile at how truly soothing this was. You hadn’t had any experience like this back in England, and the main reason for coming to Jamestown was to find someone just like Samuel… No, James. Definitely James. His hands move around your back in gentle circles as you stay nestled against one another in your calming embrace, and you start to softly hum a tune when you close your eyes.

“I’ve never heard such a sweet sound in all my life,” James sighs happily once you finish.

You lean away from him with a smile, then study his face carefully, the dirt smudged neatly at the corners of his mouth as if a thumb had been there, and you think back to Alice’s visits to him the past 24 hours. She’d left with a giddy smile on her face, and James had watched longingly as she walked away from him, his eyes practically glistening with hope and love.

There was no ill feeling at this realisation; you were obviously both with the wrong people and yet stuck together because neither of you wanted to say it first after such a short time. Your thoughts turn to Samuel and how sweet it would be to kiss his soft lips, and you take a step back from James.

“You look lost,” James frowns.

“I think I am, but I don’t think I’m the only one,” you reply, “would you mind if we tried something?”

“Of course I wouldn’t mind,” he nods.

You smile then step towards him again and place your hand on his cheek where Alice’s had surely been only hours before, then you lean up and press your lips to his. The kiss was awkward, it wasn’t natural in the slightest and both you and James felt it as you pulled away almost as quickly as you’d come together. It wasn’t meant to be and it was glaringly obvious as you stood there staring at each other.

“I’m sorry,” you say quietly, “I’m not the one you want, am I?”

“Don’t say that,” he sighs.

“It’s true. Can I speak honestly?”

“Of course.”

“It’s Alice isn’t it? She’s the one you want. It’s okay James, I’ve seen the way you look at her, I’ve never seen your face soften like it does when you’re watching her.”

“A bit like the way Castell eyes you.”

“He does?” you ask, a little taken aback by how obvious it must be, especially as you personally hadn’t noticed that much.

“Oh he does. It’s not Jocelyn that he wants; it’s you. He’s the one to give you everything you could ever wish for and you deserve that, (Y/N), you really do. You feel for him too, don’t you?”

You nod in response to his question and tilt your head down to the ground in shame at disrespecting James.

“Look at me. It’s alright, there’s no need for any guilt. We’re both as guilty as each other anyway.”

“I’m sorry.”

“There’s no need to be. That’s love. It’s unpredictable, doesn’t abide by our laws. We’ll have to be careful though. I doubt Jocelyn will be pleased with this news.”

“Jocelyn’s a...” you start, then hold your tongue once you realise what words were about to leave your mouth.

“She’s what? You can tell me y’know. I trust you with my life.”

“She’s a murderer,” you whisper, “she had to leave England because she killed a man. I heard her speaking to another girl on the boat.”

James’ mouth opens to speak but no sound comes out as he digests the news and then he steps towards you, places a hand on the back of your head and pulls you forward to kiss your forehead.

“You’ve got such a loyal and honest heart, I fear it will get you in trouble.”

“You don’t need to worry about me,” you sigh as you place your hands on his chest and feel his heart beating rapidly.

“You’re touching my soul, y’know that right?” James whispers as his lips linger on your skin, “no matter how we feel I’ll always envy the man who gets to feel your love, the warmth of your breath on his cheek every morning, the soft touch of your hand upon his skin. You came to me for a reason, and if that was to give me a taste of what I can have then that’s all I need.”

His words make you melt into his arms and he holds you tightly as you both desperately wish that the situation were different. This didn’t make it any easier for you either, as his sweet sayings made you ache inside for him, and you realised just how much of a lucky woman you are for being paired with him.

“What do we do now?” you ask meekly.

“I… don’t know… We’ve got to be careful how we go forwards from here.”

“Did you set eyes on Alice when she got off the boat?” you ask, thinking back to what Samuel had said about you.

“I did,” he sighs sadly.

“Don’t say it like that,” you smile, “it’s nothing but a good thing.”

“Is it though?”

“Absolutely. Have you spoken about anything like this with her?”

James looks down to the ground, telling you everything you needed to know within a second, and when he looks back up to meet your gaze you give him a reassuring smile to let him know that it’s okay to admit to it.

“Briefly,” he mumbles.

“Okay, I need to think,” you say.

Your head was spinning, you’d only been here a matter of days and this was all happening far too fast for you to keep up with. Where would you both go from here? James and Alice had obviously spoken about the future but she had Henry in her way, and both you and Samuel had expressed your interest in one another, but Jocelyn was very much in your way. Would there be a chance to work this all out without causing any harm to anyone else, or would this end in disaster for both of you?

“I need some air,” you say in a panic as the gravity of the situation hits you.

You stumble out into the street with your hand on your chest as your breathing quickens at an alarming rate, and James follows you to make sure you’re okay. Heading for the gates of Jamestown, you think you hear your name being called but are in not state to turn to see who it is, and you sink to your knees in the grass just outside of the wall that surrounded the settlement.

“(Y/N), it’s okay,” James says as he holds onto your upper arms, “just breathe. The doctor’s coming.”

“I don’t need… I’m fine...” you pant, trying to rise to your feet.

You manage to rise to your feet with James’ help, then as you turn back to Jamestown and see both Doctor Priestly and Samuel heading your way, your vision goes blurry and you soon drop to the ground unconscious.


	4. Chapter 4

Faint chattering is the first thing you hear when you begin to regain consciousness and you soon find yourself laying in the Doctor’s room on one of the tables as your eyes start to flutter open. The source of the hushed conversation soon reveals itself to be between Samuel and Christopher, then their attentions turn to you when you let out an involuntary groan as you try to lift your head from the hard wood beneath it.

“It’s okay,” Samuel soothes as he rushes to your side, “just stay where you are.”

His hand rests on your forehead softly and your eyes meet in a tense gaze knowing that Christopher is only feet away from you both, then when Samuel’s other hand lifts from his side to touch your arm, the Doctor is quick to intervene.

“Step aside please Samuel,” he says sharply, “I need to check her over.”

Samuel reluctantly steps away from you but never once diverts his stare from your face as Christopher goes about checking you pulse, temperature, and sight. Tears prick his eyes as he watches you wince when your stomach is prodded, and the sight of you falling to the ground earlier flashes across his mind in a painful second which is enough to force him out of the room for air.

“Tread carefully,” Christopher whispers once Samuel has disappeared, “just because Jocelyn’s loyalties lie elsewhere does not mean that she will give Samuel up willingly. He is not the type of man to be able to hide his feelings well, as you can see.”

“I… How…” you stutter, unable to put into words how you were feeling right now.

“Just be careful. Sit up slowly for me,” he says, changing the subject, “that’s it. You should be okay, but if you experience any other dizzy spells or fainting then please let me know.”

“Okay,” you nod, “thank you.”

You squint into the bright sunlight outside as you step out of the door and James is first to greet you with open arms, wrapping them tightly around you as soon as he’s close enough.

“Gave me a scare, you did,” he sighs, “such a scare.”

“I’m okay,” you whisper back as you rest your cheek against his shoulder, “don’t worry.”

“We spoke, Samuel and I...”

“James, can we not talk about this right now. I’m really not up to it.”

“Of course, sorry. Let’s get you back home to rest.”

Samuel watches on from across the street with yearning eyes, wishing it were his hands on your body helping you to the house you shared with him instead of James, and he curses himself for running out on you like that. It was true what Christopher had said; he was indeed unable to hide his true feelings and he knew he couldn’t return to Jocelyn in such a state over you, so he follows you and James as subtly as he can.

Just as you settle yourself on the bed and James covers you over with a blanket there’s a short, sharp knock at the door, and you give each other bewildered looks before James goes to open it.

“Can I come in?” Samuel asks in a slight panic.

“’Course,” James nods, stepping aside to let him pass, “you should know that (Y/N)’s resting, she’s not up to visitors.”

“I know, of course. I’m sorry to barge in like this, I just… I couldn’t face Jocelyn after what happened… I didn’t know where else to go.”

“I’ve gotta get back to work, keep an eye on (Y/N) for me,” James says, then leaves the house with a sigh.

Words had been exchanged between the two men when you’d collapsed, especially being as Samuel had run to your side without hesitation and picked you up before James could get a chance to even move a finger. There was no bad blood between them, their feelings had been laid out truthfully and each knew where they stood, but the lines were still blurred with you having to carry on your lives as they were, and James continued to have a heavy heart knowing that Samuel was with you right now. Luckily for him Alice was there waiting at his work station, and his spirits were soon lifted by the sight of her.

You lay in bed completely unaware that Samuel was just through the doorway instead of James, and when you call out for some water and see his kind face appear, it almost knocks the breath out of your lungs.

“What are you doing here?” you gasp, “where’s James?”

“He had to go back to work,” Samuel smiles as he hands you the water and perches himself on the side of your bed, “how are you feeling?”

“Apart from the slight pain in my head, I’m fine.”

“It was a nasty fall you took out there,” he whispers, “it was a frightening sight.”

You look at him over the edge of your cup as you sip on the water, and thoughts soon invade your mind about how nice it would be for him to lay next to you with his strong arms around your body making you feel safe.

“(Y/N), I…”

“Samuel Castell!” Jocelyn shrieks as her fist pounds the door, “Samuel!”

The cup tumbles from your hand, spilling the remnants of water on your bed, then rolls off of the edge to the floor with a clatter, and Samuel is quick to pick it up, press a kiss to your temple then face his fate outside the door. You hear the raised voice of Jocelyn asking him why he’d been with you for so long, but you’re soon distracted by the warm imprint of his lips on your skin, even though it was over within a second. Your fingers travel to the spot on your head, lightly grazing over the sight of the kiss as if to transfer the feeling to them so you could savour it.

“Do you mind keeping your voice down?” James butts in, “(Y/N)’s in there asleep. Samuel was keeping an eye while I work.”

Silence follows, then there’s a shuffling as Jocelyn stomps away from the scene in defeat, and you let out a deep breath as you relax into the bed once again. It was no wonder your feelings had overwhelmed you earlier and caused you to faint; this situation was getting increasingly intricate and involving more people all the time, more lives that would be changed because of straying emotions.

You get up from the bed, wash your face to freshen up, change your clothes then head outside into the fresh air with your head held high as you walk towards James and Alice to greet them with a warm smile.

“Good afternoon,” you nod at Alice.

“Where are you going?” James asks.

“For a walk, I need some fresh Virginia air,” you grin.

“Do you want me to come with you?”

“No, no, you stay here with Alice, I’ll be fine.”

With that you move away from the two and head towards the gates of Jamestown where the sun shines through them as if lighting your way into the fields that surround the colony, and you tilt your head up to the light to close your eyes for a moment as the warmth envelops you. A sigh leaves your lips as you open them again to continue your walk and there’s a calmness out here that you didn’t seem to be able to grasp within the community.

This was what you’d come to Jamestown for; a new life that would allow you to settle down with someone happily and live out the rest of your years with a family, but ever since you’d arrived, all you’d felt was an uneasiness. Maybe the best thing you could do for yourself and everyone else would be to get the next ship back to England.


	5. Chapter 5

Your head suddenly felt a lot clearer after your walk and as you packed up your few belongings back into your bag ready to head down to the docks, you try and convince yourself this is the right thing to do. The thought of leaving James was bad enough, but the thought of never seeing Samuel again made your stomach turn, making you want to be sick.

“What are you doing?” James asks as he walks into the house unexpectedly.

“I thought you were going to be out all day,” you say as you attempt to hide your bag behind your dress when you stand up and face him.

“I was until I saw you rushing around in here. What’s that behind your back?”

“Nothing, it’s nothing,” you reply unconvincingly.

“Are you packing? Where are you going?” he presses.

“James,” you sigh, “please do not utter a word of this to anyone. It’s best if I just… Leave.”

“Leave?! You can’t!”

“Why not? It makes complete sense. You will be completely free to be with Alice, Samuel will find a way to be happy with Jocelyn, and I will minimise the damage to people’s lives here. It’s too messy, I have to leave,” you explain.

James stares at you with a stunned expression as he tries to take in what you’d just said to him, and his brow soon distorts into a frown when he realises the gravity of your words.

“You can’t,” he says sharply, shaking his head from side to side, “absolutely not.”

“James, _please_. You know this would be easier for everyone, especially you. You could be with Alice for the rest of your days when I leave.”

“What about Castell?!” James asks, his voice getting louder by the second.

“He’ll-”

“He loves the bones of you. You know he does. This will break that man, and I’m not letting that happen. It’ll break me enough as it is.”

He storms out of the house and you know exactly where he’s going so you set about throwing items into your bag and running out with it as you try and close it up during your escape. The next ship was due soon, hopefully soon enough that no one would be able to to get to you before it left, and you run as fast as your legs will take you down to the river where you pace the dock impatiently as you wait.

“(Y/N),” a female voice says confidently from behind you.

You turn on your heels to find Jocelyn standing there with her hands linked at her stomach as she looks at you with an air of disgust, and two men standing just behind her that you didn’t recognise. She nods and the men make their way towards you then grab one arm each, making you drop your bag, and drag you towards Jocelyn as she turns abruptly and leads you all away from the dock.

“What are you doing? Where are we going?” you ask, struggling uselessly against the grip of these men, “answer me!”

“A better place,” she calls back.

A jolt of panic surges through your body at those words as you wonder how much she knows about you and Samuel, and whether or not she would genuinely have you killed or hurt over it. You eventually stop fighting against the men either side of you just in case you needed your strength for something else later, and you walk clumsily in between them until you’re deep into the woods that surround the settlement. When Jocelyn comes to a stop your heart starts to race as you’re brought to a halt as well, and her face is unreadable as she turns to look at you.

“It didn’t take a lot for Samuel to inform me about his improper feelings for you,” she starts, “he’s not very good at keeping secrets.”

“Neither are you. I heard you on the ship here, I know what you did,” you say, knowing this was your only upper hand on her.

“Then maybe my friends here should silence you permanently.”

“You know that’s not something that can be kept a secret forever, Jocelyn. Don’t start to act as if you’re stupid now.”

The sound of your name being called from the dock causes everyone to turn in the direction of the shouting, and you slip out of the grip of the men holding you to take a few steps towards the noise. It was clearly Samuel’s voice and he would soon see your bag left abandoned on the dock, hopefully indicating to him that something was wrong.

“Hold her,” Jocelyn orders, and one of the men pushes you against a tree with his hand wrapped tightly around your neck.

You grab onto his arm with both hands, trying in vain to pull him off of you and let you breathe, but it was no use, and your strangled cries were too quiet for Samuel to hear.

“Please,” you beg, “please.”

“Looks as though we’ve come to an impasse here,” Jocelyn states calmly as she steps towards you slowly, “you can have Samuel, I have no use for him, but if you utter one word about what you supposedly heard on the ship I will make sure that your life will not be worth living.”

With that, she nods at the man holding onto you and he lets go, causing you to drop to the ground as you gasp for much needed air, and the three of them leave you in a heap on the leafy dirt. Jocelyn emerges from the woods with the two men following close behind and she eyes Samuel with distaste as she passes him.

“Where is she?!” he demands.

A nod to the trees is all he gains as a reply and he runs into the dense woodland before Jocelyn’s even turned her head back to the direction she is walking. It doesn’t take him long to find your hunched over figure still struggling for air on the ground, and he’s quick to drop down in front of you and lift your head to face him. He spots the red marks on your neck straight away, knowing that one of those brutish men put their hands on you in a threatening way, and an anger bubbles up inside him like nothing he’d ever felt before. Before he can verbally react to the sight before him you throw your arms around his neck and begin to sob into his shoulder.

“Take me home,” you whisper, “please take me home.”

“Home,” he nods as he scoops you up into his arms.

He carries you all the way back to Jamestown, your head still buried in his neck as he walks, and when you arrive back at the settlement everyone seems to stop what they’re doing to watch as he carries you to his house. Mercy is at the door before you both reach it and she stands aside as you both enter then quickly shuts everyone’s prying eyes out with a gasp as she sees the crowd that had gathered.

“Can you fetch some water please Mercy?” Samuel asks as he lays you down on the bed gently.

“Of course Master Castell. Is Miss (Y/L/N) alright? She doesn’t look very well at all. Should I get the doctor?” Mercy babbles as you keep your eyes closed and stretch your neck out once safely on the bed.

“Just the water will be fine for now thank you. She’ll be okay,” Samuel smiles kindly as she scuttles off.

Samuel perches himself on the edge of the bed to stroke the hair from your face as you lay there in obvious distress, and he leans down to press a kiss to your cheek and whisper reassuring words in your ear.

“You’re safe my love. You’re safe with me.”

“Master Castell, why did Miss Woodbryg pack all of her things and leave while you were out?” Mercy asks as she hands him a cup of water for you.

“Mercy, we will speak about this later, I must look after (Y/N) for now.”

“Of course, Sir. Is there anything else I can do?”

“Could you please inform James Read that she is here being taken care of?”

“Absolutely,” she nods, then rushes out of the door as fast as her feet will take her.

“Everything will be okay,” Samuel whispers as he leans down to you again, “I promise.”

You sit yourself up a little as you open your eyes to take the water, then look at him with a worried expression as one hand strokes over the red raw skin on your neck.

“I’m afraid it won’t be,” you croak.


	6. Chapter 6

Confusion was the first thing you felt as you woke up in this unfamiliar house, but relief soon washed over you as you looked to the side to see Samuel laying there next to you; his shirt so temptingly open that you can’t help but reach out and trace your fingers over his exposed skin, moving through the scattering of hair on his chest so lightly he barely stirred from his slumber. How was this happening? How were your dreams coming true? The man next to you was utter perfection, and you try to hold back from kissing him but those lips had been kept from you for too long already.

Samuel must have been awake for a while but laying with his eyes shut, as when your lips meet his for that first proper kiss he reacts immediately, and within seconds his hands are running through your hair then sliding down your body while his lips devour you so desperately it makes you feel things you’d never felt before. This was the passion that had been missing with James, and this kiss was fulfilling almost every desire you had for Samuel. The two of you are panting as your lips part and you come up for air, then you rest your foreheads against one another’s as your breath becomes one between your mouths.

“The birds have never sounded so sweet, the sky has never been so clear, and the sun has never been so bright as they are today,” Samuel smiles, “I’ve never felt such joy in my life as I do now.”

“Is that right my love?” you ask with a grin.

“Oh, say it again my sweet, say it again and my heart is yours for all of time.”

“My love,” you whisper.

“Again,” he breathes.

“My love.”

“I never knew two words could sound so intoxicating coming from your lips.”

“Samuel,” you giggle, looking down shyly.

“I’m so in love with you,” he says, leaning back so his can tilt your head up to meet his gaze once again, “so utterly in love with you.”

He looks down at your body, your nightdress askew after your passionate moment together, and he takes a deep breath.

“Our wedding night,” he breathes, closing his eyes momentarily as he imagines your bodies connecting on yet another level, “oh, god, our wedding night.”

“Samuel,” you practically groan, “that thought is much too tempting.”

He smiles at you then licks his lips, but from the corner of his eye he sees the mark on your neck from the previous day and his expression falls as his fingers ghost over the bruised area as gently as possible. He dips his head down and lets his lips attempt to kiss it better as you lay back on the bed and let him drape himself over you.

“Master Castell- Oh! Oh my! I… Oh goodness.. Umm...” Mercy babbles as she walks in on you both and covers her eyes with her hand so innocently.

“Yes Mercy?” he asks, sitting up and straightening up his night shirt as you perch yourself on the opposite side of the bed.

“Sorry Master Castell, but Master Read is here to see you and Miss (Y/L/N).”

“Of course. Can you help Miss (Y/L/N) dress please Mercy? You can take your hand down...” he smiles as he gets up and tucks his shirt into a pair of trousers he’d quickly picked up from the chair next to his bed.

“Yes, Master. Of course I can,” she nods.

Mercy comes to sit down next to you when Samuel exits the room and she immediately stares at the mark on your neck.

“Master Castell told me why you are here Miss (Y/L/N),” she says, trying to lift her gaze to your face, “and I’m very glad. You were so kind to me when Miss Woodbryg lashed out, I’m very grateful. She is a cruel woman and you did not deserve what happened to you.”

“Thank you, Mercy. Neither did you,” you nod.

“Does it hurt, Miss?”

“A little, yes,” you reply, your hand automatically lifting to your neck.

Mercy helps you with your corset, threading it up and tying it looser than usual at the back to help you breathe easier being as it was painful with your injured neck at the moment. When dressed you join the two men in the sitting area and both of them stand when you enter the room, then James notices your bruises and his face changes from one of happiness at seeing you again to one filled with anger.

“Did she do that?!” James shouts.

“It’s as I said, James, one of the men that were with her were responsible for the injuries,” Samuel explains.

James looks from Samuel to you, then back again, and eventually he moves over to where you stand quietly and places his hands on your upper arms as you try and avoid his stare.

“Look at me,” he demands softly, “are you okay?”

“As well as I can be,” you smile.

“She will not stop,” James warns, turning towards Samuel, “this is just the beginning. She can’t leave (Y/N) for risk of-”

“James!” you frown.

“What? What is it?” Samuel asks.

“James, do you mind giving us some privacy please?” you ask, and he nods solemnly, knowing the news you need to share with Samuel.

“I’ll be back later. Let me know if you need anything; both of you.”

James leaves the house and Samuel sits you down so he can kneel in front of you and take in whatever you had to say. It didn’t matter to him, he wanted to hear it all, everything you had to say, especially if it concerned your own safety.

“Your face is etched with worry, my love. Please tell me what’s on your mind,” he pleads quietly.

“I overheard Jocelyn on the ship to Jamestown… She divulged some information to another passenger about how she killed a man. Poison, she said. That’s why she came here so desperate to marry, because she could no longer stay in England. She knows I heard her and she told me that my life would not be worth living if I uttered a word to another,” you explain, suddenly finding yourself crying even though you hadn’t realised that tears were falling down your cheeks, “I’m sorry, Samuel, I’m so sorry.”

“Shh, don’t cry (Y/N), it’s okay, everything will be okay,” Samuel comforts as you slip from the chair onto your knees on the floor in front of him, “I’ll protect you, I _promise.”_

“Samuel,” you sob, “I should have left, I should have gone.”

“ _No. Never._ Don’t ever say that again. We will face this together, as man and wife,” he says sincerely, holding your face between his hands to concentrate your gaze, “I’ll see the minister today, we’ll set a date for the wedding. I can’t wait for you to be my wife.”

His smile is infectious and through the tears your mouth manages to turn up into a faint smile back at him, making his face light up at your reaction. This man gave you hope, so much hope that your life could turn out how you wanted it to, but now there was this dark cloud hanging over you, ready to pour down at any given moment, and you knew no matter how much hope there was that this wouldn’t be disappearing any time soon.

“I can’t wait to be your wife, Samuel,” you sigh happily as your hand strokes his bearded cheek.

A knock at the door goes completely unnoticed by you both until Mercy gasps as she answers it, and when the two of you look up to see what’s happened, there stands Jocelyn on her own this time with the same look of disdain from the previous day.

“Not interrupting, am I?” she smirks.


	7. Chapter 7

Samuel stands up straight away, shielding you with his legs as he moves to block Jocelyn’s view of you as the thought of her eyes upon you again was enough to make him physically sick with rage. He was naturally a very quiet and docile man but after what had happened he was fully prepared to kill for you, and felt fiercely protective.

“Do _not_ take another step into this house,” Samuel hisses as she goes to move inside further, “outside.”

She nods before backing out of the door obligingly while Samuel then turns back to you to bend down and kiss the top of your head, letting his lips linger on your hair as he wishes that you would both just be left alone.

“Stay here, I’ll be back in a moment,” he whispers, “Mercy, can you keep your eye on her please?”

“Yes Master Castell, of course I can,” she nods enthusiastically as he passes her to walk out into the street.

You were scared for him but somehow your body couldn’t move for fear after hearing her voice and remembering those awful events that had only happened the previous day, and you felt completely helpless as you sat there on the floor now sobbing at your own weakness.

“Miss (Y/L/N), please don’t cry,” Mercy says as she kneels next to you, “Master Castell will be ever so upset if he comes back to see you crying, and I don’t like to see you cry either. He’ll be okay, he’s only just outside.”

You lean against Mercy, the poor girl not knowing what to do when you do so, and she tentatively puts her arms around you as your tears finally stop. She almost jumps out of her skin when Samuel enters the house again, slamming the door behind him as he does so, and when he notices you both curled on the floor his first instinct is to pick you up and take you back into the bedroom as Mercy quickly busies herself with fetching water to give you two some privacy.

“You’ve been crying my love,” he sighs as he lays next to you and watches your chest rise and fall hypnotically.

“It was nothing, I just didn’t expect to see her again so soon...” you sigh, turning your head to face him as he lays on his side looking down at you, “what did she say?”

“Not a lot. She was asking questions about what you’d said about her; I didn’t reveal what you’d told me of course.”

You smile up at his handsome face, his own smile tugging at the corners of his mouth but not quite reaching his eyes as the lie about Jocelyn already starts to lay heavy with guilt in the pit of his stomach. She’d actually said quite a lot, mostly about wanting information pertaining to Governor Yeardley, Secretary Farlow, and Marshal Redwick, and the plans for the expansion of the colony. Then she’d gone on to threaten your life if Samuel failed to deliver any credible information to her within the next week.

“What’s wrong my darling?” you ask as you see Samuel’s face change into a frown.

“The wedding,” he says quickly, “we must get on with the planning. We shall be married by the end of the week!”

“Well that’s no time at all,” you chuckle, “that leaves only three days!”

“It’s three days too many,” he sighs, resting his forehead against yours softly.

“Samuel, are you well my love?” you ask, noticing the sad undertones of his voice.

“I’m sorry if I seem distracted sweetheart,” he smiles, “my desperation to call you mine is getting the better of me, and my fingers are aching to touch your skin already, yet I know it’s so forbidden.”

“Samuel, the end of the week will come around so quickly and we’ll be able to express our love in so many more ways with one another,” you whisper as you stroke his cheek softly, “I’m just as desperate for you my love.”

You both move your bodies towards one another on the bed and there’s a moment where the two of you hold your breath as you try not to give in to the urges, and luckily the sounds of Mercy singing from the next room make you part with a smile.

“Mercy, will you come out with me today to help pick flowers for the wedding?” you ask when you go in to see her.

“Oh! Miss (Y/L/N)! I very much would love to do that. Have you decided when you two will be married?” she asks excitedly.

“By the end of the week!” you reply with a grin.

“My goodness! We have so much to do, Miss! Oh my word, there’s the cake, the dress, the gifts, the food!” she lists as she appears to walk around in circles.

“Mercy!” you giggle, taking her shoulders softly and stopping her from making herself dizzy, “it’s okay, it will all work out.”

“Yes, yes of course it will. We need to get going now though!” she says, taking your hand and leading you out of the house, much to Samuel’s amusement.

“Have fun, you two,” he calls out as he leans against the door frame and watches as you both scuttle away happily.

It was true, he was ever so desperate to feel your skin against his, but he also thought that marrying would offer you some kind of protection from Jocelyn and the men that seemed to be under her spell and willing to hurt someone for her. If you both married then you’d be with him day and night, and could always keep a watchful eye over you. He just needed to get something for her to keep her occupied with whatever it was she was planning, and although he knew it was dangerous to meddle, he was in the opportune job as company recorder. This would be the only time. It had to be.

“Mistress Castell...” Mercy says without thinking as you walk through the settlement, “oh, I didn’t mean to… I’m so sorry… It just… I’m excited is all.”

“It’s okay Mercy,” you chuckle, “it sounds nice, doesn’t it?”

“Oh it does, and it very much suits you more than anyone else!” she grins.

“That means a lot, thank you.”

“Master Castell loves you very much, Miss. I saw his face when master Read’s name was called for you, I’d never seen such sadness in it.”

“Dear Mercy,” you smile, taking her hands in yours, “I love him more than words can say, and I promise I will bring him all the joy I can in life.”

“That’s beautiful. I hope to have a love like yours one day,” she says, tearing up a little.

“You will, and it will be just as wonderful.”

You both carry on your walk arm in arm until James Read catches your attention and the two of you walk over to his forge to see what he has to say.

“What did Jocelyn want earlier?” he asks with concern.

“She spoke to Samuel outside, so I don’t know exactly what their conversation was about, but I’m sure he would have said if-”

“(Y/N), you have to believe me now, that woman is out to hurt you. Samuel may want to protect you from what they spoke about, but I know she made some sort of threat towards you judging by his reaction. Please talk to him and get him to tell you the truth, I beg you,” James says, taking your hand between his, “I can’t see anything bad happen to you.”

You look down at your hand in his and slowly slip it out of his grasp then turn to Mercy with a forced smile.

“Mercy, could you pick some flowers for the wedding please? And possibly get the ingredients for the cake? Would that be okay?”

“Of course Mistress Castell… Oh, sorry… Miss (Y/L/N).”

She hurries off, a little worried over James’ obvious affections for you and his meddling, but she knows that your love for Samuel would overcome anything, even if he did keep this matter from you.

“What if you’re wrong?” you ask him.

“I’m not, because I would have reacted exactly the same way if she had threatened harm against you, to me.”

“You mean Alice.”

“No. You,” he says sincerely, “you’re marrying Castell soon then?”

“The end of the week,” you nod.

“Then I promise to keep my feelings locked inside this chest,” he sighs.

“I don’t understand,” you frown, “Alice is the one for you.”

“I don’t fully understand it myself, but a part of my heart left with you when Samuel took you that day.”

You look at his glistening eyes and take his hand in yours, running your fingers over his dusty, bruised, and injured skin. Who knew that the blacksmith would have such a deep and loving heart inside him under all those layers of dirt that adorned his skin?

“I need to speak to Samuel about his conversation,” you say, keeping your eyes fixed at the ground.

“Of course,” James whispers.


	8. Chapter 8

James was at the forefront of your mind right now with his admission of feelings, but as you hurried back to Samuel you tried your best to push those thoughts to the back of your mind, because there were much more important things to be concentrating on. You rush through the front door, much to Samuel’s surprise, and he leaps out of his seat to greet you, worrying that something has happened.

“Is everything well, my love?” he asks as he takes your hands in his.

“Samuel… I need to ask you a question, and I need you to tell me the truth,” you say sternly as he leads you over to sit down next to him.

“Of course, I promise I would never lie to you.”

“I’m afraid you have already, but I need you to speak honestly now… What exactly did Jocelyn say to you, and did she threaten harm against me?”

Samuel’s face falls at your question, knowing that he had to tell you everything now even though he so desperately wanted to keep you safe from Jocelyn’s wicked ways, and he lets out a sigh as he shuffles closer to you on the seat and places your hands on his thigh so he can stroke your fingers as he explains.

“I’m so sorry (Y/N), I’m so sorry,” he sighs, “the only reason I didn’t fully explain what she’d said was because in some twisted way I was trying to protect you from it all. I saw how you reacted when you looked at her; you were crying uncontrollably and I just wanted to shield you from everything. It was the wrong decision of course, because you’re such a strong woman, I wasn’t thinking straight. She wants information from me, well, from Governor Yeardley, Secretary Farlow, and Marshal Redwick to be more specific, and if I don’t deliver something credible to her within a week...” he trails off and takes a deep breath, “she threatened that something would happen to you which would be longer lasting than what happened before.”

“Oh, Samuel,” you sigh sadly, “please don’t do it, don’t put yourself in danger like that. What if they find out what you’re doing? Those kind of men won’t take kindly to being spied on like that. You mustn’t go through with this.”

“I _have_ to, I cannot let anything else happen to you,” he frowns.

“No, I won’t let you Samuel…” you pause as your thoughts race, then look up at him as soon as the idea flashes in your mind, “I’ll do it.”

“You… No! Absolutely not, (Y/N),” he replies angrily.

“Let me explain… It would be better if I did it, as no one would expect me to be listening to what’s going on, or taking any notice, and if word did get back about information being shared then the blame would not fall on you.”

Samuel mulls it over as he searches your eyes for any kind of doubt in your plan but there was none; you loved him far to much to allow him to put himself in danger for you, and there was no way you were going to let Jocelyn have any power over him like this. You wait quietly for his reply and as he realises that this would be a better way of going about what he’d been asked to do, he lets out a defeated breath.

“Only this once,” he says, “never again.”

“Only this once,” you nod, stroking his cheek softly, “I love you.”

“I love you too, more than I can express. Oh, (Y/N), I cannot wait to become your husband,” he says as he leans his forehead down against yours and closes his eyes.

“Mistress Castell!” Mercy pants as she comes bursting through the door with flowers under her arms, “sorry, Miss (Y/L/N), it’s Master Read! He’s been hurt and he’s asking for you!”

“Where’s Alice?” you ask as Samuel looks between you and Mercy with confusion.

“She… She’s gone to the Sharrow’s farm, went this morning and hasn’t returned yet,” Mercy explains.

“Come with me Samuel,” you say as you stand and hold your hand out for his.

He takes it without hesitation and you both walk hurriedly over to James’ house where you find him nursing a head wound that was bleeding quite badly into a bucket as he tried to hold a rag over it.

“James,” you gasp, letting go of Samuel’s hand and going to kneel in front of the injured man, “oh goodness, what happened? Samuel, could you get Doctor Priestley please?”

“Of course my love,” he nods before disappearing.

“This was Jocelyn,” James whispers as soon as Samuel’s gone, “that woman is a _menace_ , and I swear on my life I will kill her if she goes anywhere near you again.”

“James, don’t say such things,” you frown as you take over holding the piece of cloth to try and stem the bleeding.

“I love you, (Y/N), she knows it and she’s going to use that against me-”

“Right, what seems to be the problem?” Doctor Priestley asks as he walks in with Samuel close behind.

You stand up and step back from him until Samuel captures you in his arms, wrapping them tightly around your body as his fingers grab fistfuls of fabric from your dress, and you hold onto his forearms as James keeps his eyes fixed on you while the Doctor tends to his wound.

“We should go,” you whisper as you turn yourself around to face Samuel.

He nods in agreement after hearing James’ confession to you and leads you outside into the suddenly damp and heavy air; although that could of course be in your imagination after James’ bold words. Samuel brings your arm up to link through his before diverting off course and steering you towards the gates of Jamestown with the two of you exiting the settlement in silence.

“It appears our lives are not the only ones being affected by that woman,” Samuel states matter of factly as you wander down by the river, “she’s doing a lot of damage to people here, but I promise she will never come between us.”

“Did you hear what James told me?” you ask tentatively, already knowing the answer.

“That man does not speak as quietly as he thinks he does… I do not believe he said it for any personal gain.”

You both stand in silence as you watch the water ripple up to the edge of the embankment, both of you unsure of what to say next about this ever increasingly chaotic situation you suddenly found yourselves in.

“I should have left that day. None of this would have happened if I had just got down to the dock and walked onto a boat without a word to anyone,” you sigh sadly as you try to slide your arm away from Samuel.

“I would have found you, I would have brought you back to Jamestown to be my wife, make no mistake,” he frowns as he grips your hand to prevent you from moving away from him, “do not let _anyone_ make you think this is your fault.”

You look out at the calm waters before moving around to stand in front of Samuel and reaching both hands up to land gently on his cheeks, then you slowly bring him down towards your lips until you’re able to capture his with a loving kiss. It soon turns heated as his hands grasp your hips and pull them into his body; the two of you becoming breathless as you fight your sexual urges.

“Samuel,” you pant as you break apart, “we mustn’t.”

“Your lips are so sweet, I can only imagine what the rest of you tastes like,” he breathes.

You gasp as you step away from him to take a breath and create some distance before one of you escalates the situation, but he follows you to take your hand in his and place it upon his cheek once more.

“Promise me we will not give another thought to anyone else until we’re married,” Samuel pleads as his worries surface, and you frown at his words.

“I’ll never give another thought to anyone as long as we live my love. You’re everything, my absolute world,” you reply.

He sighs in relief and briefly closes his eyes as he leans into the palm of your hand, and you slide your other hand up the front of his waistcoat to let your fingers play lightly with the small buttons.

“How I’ve longed for you to say those words to me,” he breathes.

“Let’s get back home my love, we have a wedding to plan,” you smile.

The two of you walk happily back to Jamestown, so completely wrapped up in one another that you take no notice of the watchful eyes of both James and Jocelyn; one looking on in despair at the sight of you so happy, and the other with a scheming glare.


	9. Chapter 9

“Mercy, they are beautiful!” you beam as she hands you the bouquet she’d created from the flowers she picked a couple of days ago.

“Today is a very important day and you must have the most beautiful bouquet ever,” she grins.

“Today is going to be perfect because of you, Mercy,” you smile as you sniff the cream coloured petals.

“You’re going to make me cry already, Miss,” she almost sobs while she begins to fix the last few strands of your hair in place, “Master Castell won’t know what to do with himself when he sees you.”

“I’m not sure I’ll know what to do with myself when I see him,” you chuckle nervously.

This was the day you’d been waiting for since you arrived in Jamestown, although admittedly it wasn’t with the person you first thought it would be, and you could not have been happier as you managed to push all negative thoughts to the back of your mind and concentrate on marrying the love of your life.

“Today is such a happy day, I don’t think I’ll be able to stop crying all day!” Mercy babbles as she finishes up your hair, “oh, Miss (Y/L/N), you look ever so beautiful.”

You rise from your chair and look down at yourself then smile up at Mercy excitedly before taking a deep breath and walking out of the house towards the church. Residents of the settlement line the path you take, all giving their congratulations as you pass them with Mercy right behind you, and when you get to the open doors of the church to see Samuel standing there in all his finery as he waits to become your husband, you can’t help but let a tear slip down your cheek.

“Wow,” he whispers when you finally reach him and you see his eyes glistening as well, “just… wow.”

All you can do is smile at him after being rendered completely speechless at his beauty and as he holds onto your hand while you both recite the vows, you find yourself only just managing to remember what to say. The ceremony is over all too soon and you both emerge from the church with giddy smiles, unable to take your eyes off of one another as people throw petals over you both.

“Master Castell, Mistress Castell, drinks are to be had in your honour at the public house,” Mercy says over the cheering going on around you.

“You go on ahead, Mercy,” Samuel grins, “we’ll join everyone later.”

“Later?” you ask as Mercy scuttles off happily.

“This way, Mistress Castell,” he winks as he leads you both away from the crowd and back to the house.

James watches as you both cross the threshold into your home, knowing that the marriage was soon to be consummated in the bed you shared with your now husband, and he feels his heart shatter into a million pieces at the thought of Samuel being able to feel all the warmth from your soft flesh; his lips having unrestricted access to the most intimate of places that he could only ever dream of now.

“Samuel,” you breathe as he begins to suck on your neck, “oh my goodness, Samuel!”

You’d never experienced anything like this before in your life and the sensations it was stirring deep inside you were new and exciting, yet at the same time strange to you, but if this was only the beginning then you were already looking forward to what was to come. His fingers tug at the ties on the corset at your back, but they don’t come loose easily and he lets out a huff as he realises he has to lose contact with you to turn you around to untie the knots.

“I think Mercy did too good of a job on that corset,” he chuckles as he finally gets the ties undone.

He turns you to face him once more and you let the dress drop to the ground to reveal your now naked body to him, and his eyes almost pop out of his head at the sight of you.

“I’ve waited for so long to touch you,” he exhales.

“Take me to bed my love,” you smile as you place a hand upon his cheek.

He sweeps you off your feet, scooping you up into his arms, and carries you into the bedroom where he lays you down on the bedding gently, then he takes a moment to savour the view of you waiting for him.

“You’re so beautiful. The most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on,” he says as he wriggles out of his clothes as quickly as possible.

“Samuel,” you giggle before biting your lip when his length springs free.

He lays next to you ever so carefully, then runs his hand up and down your body slowly as he takes in the fact that you were his now; completely and utterly his for as long as you both lived.

“I’m so in love with you,” he whispers before moving down the bed and lifting your legs.

He kneels on the edge of the bed as he grips onto your ankles and parts your legs, then sets them down either side of him so he can lean down and begin to kiss his way up your calf, and he makes sure to switch to the other leg to do the same before moving up to your thighs. The closer he got to the increasingly sensitive part between your legs, the more your body twitched in response to each wet kiss he pressed against your skin, and when he plants one directly into your folds, your hips buck up off of the bed and your hands grab for the covers.

“Samuel!” you call out.

James doesn’t know why he’s hovering near your house, maybe it was a subconscious way to punish himself for his now unlawful feelings for you, but whatever the reason was he could hear everything that was going on inside. The way Samuel’s name fell from your lips in such unadulterated pleasure seemed to constrict his heart every time he heard it, yet he couldn’t seem to tear himself away and out of earshot. Samuel then repeats your name over and over in hushed, strained tones, and finally James walks away slowly, knowing that the only way your name would leave his own mouth in such a way would be when he’s very much on his own.

“If I hurt you, let me know and I’ll stop,” Samuel says as he finally reaches your face after kissing his way up your entire body.

You nod as your arms wrap around his shoulders as you brace yourself for what’s to come, and he first inserts two fingers inside you to see how that feels, then he starts the move them in and out slowly while making sure to curl them up towards your front wall.

“How does that feel sweetheart?” he asks.

“That feels good,” you reply as your hips start to move slowly in time with his movements.

Samuel’s lips begin to devour yours as everything begins to get a little more heated, and soon he’s removing his fingers and lining himself up with your entrance. He pushes himself inside little by little, his lips hoping to distract you from any pain you’d be feeling, but he can feel you wincing beneath him even though you try to stifle any sounds.

“I won’t move until you’re comfortable,” he whispers as he pulls back from your now red and swollen lips.

“I love you, Samuel,” you sigh as you run your hands up his broad chest, “feeling you inside me is something other worldly.”

“Oh, (Y/N), my beautiful wife. I’ve waited for this day for so long, I could lay here like this with you forever. The feeling is most overwhelming.”

He dips his head into the crook of your neck and swirls patterns into your skin with his tongue as his lips massage the area, and you finally feel ready for him to move so you let one hand travel down his back until it reaches his peachy backside and give him a squeeze as you move your hips up into him.

“Are you sure?” he mumbles.

“Yes, Samuel please, my body positively aches for you,” you groan.

His movements are slow and deliberate as you adjust to the slightly painful sensation of him moving inside you, but your slick arousal that coated your walls helped him slide back and forth with ease thankfully. Overall it doesn’t take long for Samuel to orgasm, and finally you can feel the pain subsiding to waves of pleasure as he pumps himself inside you until he’s completely finished.

“Is that-?”

“No my love, I’m sorry, I couldn’t hold back my excitement, but I’m going to make sure you feel everything you should,” he whispers.

He pulls out which makes you gasp at the loss of such a fulfilling sensation, then he starts to stroke himself back to a stiffer state as he eyes your naked body, but you sit up and crawl towards him so you can move his hand out of the way and take over.

“Oh, (Y/N),” he pants as you keep up the fast pace he had going, “this is… Oh…”

His eyes close as you watch him grow between your fingers, but he knows that if he lets you carry on like that it won’t be long until he’s neglecting your own orgasm once more.

“Stop sweetheart, that’s enough,” he strains, placing his hand on your wrist, “do you want to swap position?”

“What do you mean?” you question.

“Come here,” he smiles, “I’ll show you.”

He shuffles to the head of the bed and sits up against the wall, then guides you up his legs with a knee either side of him, and lifts your hands to rest on his shoulders.

“Lower yourself down my darling,” he instructs as he holds himself still for you.

You do as he says and let yourself sink over his entire length with an almighty moan.

“Wow,” you breathe.

“Take it at your own pace and tell me if this feels good,” he says as you begin to move tentatively and he presses his thumb against the small nub at the front of your vagina, causing you to gasp at the overwhelming sensation that jolts throughout your body.

“That feels… Oh goodness… I can’t speak,” you stutter out with a ragged breath.

His smile widens as he watches the pleasure creep across your face and he rolls his thumb around the sweet spot as you push yourself up and down with more enthusiasm. Something was building down below in the pit of your stomach and you didn’t know what it was but you knew it would need releasing soon, and as Samuel speeds up to match your rhythm, his free hand slides around your waist to pull you forwards with each downward movement you make. Noises you’d never made before in your life suddenly tumble from your lips as the feeling that had been building now reaches a critical point and your body stills as you tighten one final time before releasing around his thick girth with an extended moan.

“What was…? Oh my… Samuel,” you pant as you collapse into his chest.

You didn’t even feel him twitching again inside you thanks to your own climax, and the two of you slide down onto the bed in a sweaty, breathless heap. You try and move off of his length, but Samuel’s strong arms make sure you’re not going anywhere as they keep you pressed against him.

“I love you, I love you so very much,” Samuel whispers.

“I love you too, husband,” you smile lazily against his skin.


	10. Chapter 10

Your blissful nap after love making is disturbed by a tapping at your door, and you reluctantly move off of Samuel to watch him get out of bed, get dressed, then walk out of the room as slowly as he possibly could. He was such a handsome man, and his body was so beautiful you were sure you’d never get bored of seeing him naked. You sigh happily as he answers the door and you wriggle down beneath the sheets awaiting his return to your warmth.

“We have been summoned,” Samuel smiles as he returns, “unfortunately not enough drink has been consumed yet to make people forget we’re meant to be at the celebration.”

“Can we steal a few more moments together?” you ask as you lift the covers away from your body and reveal yourself to him once more.

“Of course we can,” he grins as he hurriedly discards his clothes and jumps into bed with you.

Samuel’s lips press soft yet needy kisses against every part of your skin as he hovers above you and your face begins to ache with the constant smile that was lifting your features as you lay underneath him. Your fingers sweep through his thick locks as his head moves up and down your body in carefully considered lines, making sure not to miss one inch of your skin, and you gently guide him up to meet your now desperate lips that ache to feel his again.

“We really should go,” he groans when the kiss eventually ends, “although I could stay here with you forever.”

“Forever?” you ask with a smile as you nudge your nose against his.

“Forever,” he nods, letting out a contented sigh.

“I’m looking forward to coming home again already,” you grin as you peel yourself away from his body and get out of bed to get back into your wedding dress, “can you lace me up?”

“I’m not sure I can...” he chuckles as he gets out of bed and walks up behind you, “my fingers will not allow me to cover your irresistible body.”

“Samuel,” you laugh as you sweep your hair out of the way for him.

You eventually get to the gathering much later than planned, and receive a loud cheer when you both walk through the door of the tavern to see your friends and neighbours having a drink on your special day. Your eyes spot James sitting in the corner nursing a cup on his own, but you have no time to think about him and his words today as you bring your eyes back to the people standing in front of you and giving their congratulations.

“I’m sure it won’t be long until we have our first babe in the settlement,” Temperance smiles as she takes your hand in hers, “Jamestown will thrive thanks to those such as you and Samuel.”

“We can only hope,” you agree.

“Now, now, this is a time for celebration, eh?!” Verity interrupts, “the future of Jamestown can wait while we celebrate these two!”

You laugh as she pulls you away from your husband’s side and hands you a cup of something that stings the back of your throat when you take a sip, then two of you begin to dance as best you can with the amount of people that were currently packed into the small tavern.

“May I interrupt?” James asks as he stands awkwardly next to you and Verity.

“Only if it’s to congratulate the girl,” Verity winks as she backs away and allows James to stand face to face with you.

“Happiness radiates from your face,” he states, “it suits you.”

“I’ve never been happier,” you smile, before realising what you’ve said, “not that I wasn’t with you… I...”

“There’s no need to explain yourself,” he sighs, “you look beautiful. I wish it were me in Samuel’s position. He’s a lucky man and I hope he knows it.”

“He certainly does,” Jocelyn intrudes, “look at his beaming face over there. It’s an awful shame that James had to sink to such a low to hear those sweet little moans of yours earlier. You’ve really cast a spell over this one, (Y/N). And do remind Samuel he has one more day, won’t you?”

She smirks before turning away curtly and disappearing back into the crowd, leaving you frowning in utter confusion at her words about James until they click into place within a few seconds, and your hand comes up to cover your mouth in shock.

“I didn’t mean to… I was passing...” James says, but you can’t listen to another word as you think about how your most intimate moment with the man you loved so dearly had been listened in on by a man you’d never have thought would do such a thing to you, “I really wouldn’t, I’m so sorry. Please believe me when I say it was a complete accident, it was never my intention to- (Y/N), come back!”

You push your way through the crowd, passing your husband without even a second glance as the shock takes over and your main priority becomes getting out into the fresh air as soon as possible. A loud, stuttered sigh leaves your mouth when you get out into the open, and you silently curse Jocelyn for upsetting you on your wedding day. Strong, familiar arms wrap around your body from behind and when you look down to see Samuel’s hands, his wedding ring is the first thing that catches your eye.

“What’s wrong, my love?” he asks as he continues to hold you tightly.

“Not here, darling,” you sigh as you pull his hands away from your waist and lead him back home.

“What is it?” he asks as soon as the front door shuts behind you both, and he cups your face with his slender hands.

“Why couldn’t she just let us be for one day?” you ask as tears threaten to spill from your eyes, “just one day?!”

“Jocelyn,” Samuel sighs.

“And James! This is a mess, a complete mess. Why can’t everyone just leave us alone? I can’t live like this.”

“Come here,” Samuel says quietly as he leads you to the chair and pulls you down onto his lap once he’s sat down, “my beautiful bride,” he smiles as he tucks a piece of your hair behind you ear, “tell me what happened.”

“I was talking to James when she came over and remarked on the fact that he had heard us together earlier, insinuating that he had purposely listened to our… _moment._ Then she said to remind you that you have one more day.”

“That man is trying my patience,” Samuel replies through gritted teeth, “and as for _her_ , I’m not sure I can take much more.”

“What are we going to do?” you ask as you nestle against your husband.

“Escape back to England on the next ship?” Samuel suggests with a smirk.

“Sounds like the best option right now,” you sigh, “I need some air, you stay my love and I’ll be back before you know it.”

“Let me come with you,” Samuel says, sliding forwards in his chair as soon as you remove yourself from his lap.

“Samuel,” you smile before stepping in between his legs and letting his head lean against your bosom as you stroke the side of his face, “I’ll be back soon. I think you should keep the bed warm for when I get back.”

He lifts his head from your body and grins up at you with his beautiful blue orbs staring straight into your soul, and you bend down to kiss his sweet lips over and over until you both begin to laugh. You step outside into the sparse town where most people are still crowded around the tavern, and as you begin to walk in the opposite direction you spot Farlow and Redwick talking together outside the church. This was your opportunity and you tiptoe towards them, making sure to stay out of sight but get close enough to hear what they were saying.

“Well _something_ happened for Yeardley to be knighted and appointed governor,” Farlow hisses.

“Are we even sure he had a meeting with King James?” Redwick questions.

“Temperance let slip, and she could let slip a lot more if we pushed her...”

“If we threatened the governor’s wife, our heads would be had!”

“Then maybe it would require a woman’s touch?” Farlow suggests.

At this, you scuttle off towards the tavern in an attempt to find Jocelyn, and as you search for her through the crowd of people, Mercy falls into your arms with a beaming expression.

“Mistress Castell!” she grins, you suspect after having one too many of those drinks Verity was handing out, “you look so beautiful today, I could cry and cry at how lovely you look.”

“Oh, Mercy,” you giggle as you help her to stand, “I think Pepper is looking a little lonely over there, don’t you?”

“Shall I go talk to him?”

“I think you should follow your heart,” you smile, and she soon heads towards him on wobbly feet.

You walk past the tavern and finally catch a glimpse of the woman you needed to speak to, and you hitch your dress up a little as you begin to run towards her.

“Jocelyn!” you call out, much to her surprise.

“Yes?” she asks with an air of importance.

“I have some information for you.”

“Information?”

“Don’t act dumb, I know what you asked Samuel to do. Does this gossip _have_ to come from him, or will it be enough to come from me?” you ask sharply.

“You will do.”

“I’m so glad,” you reply sarcastically, “Farlow and Redwick were saying how Temperance had let slip to them that Yeardley had met with King James before being appointed governor, which seemed to have happened unexpectedly, and they mentioned that maybe a woman’s touch would be needed to find out exactly what was said in that meeting.”

She takes in the words you’d just said to her and her eyes light up at the fact they’d need a woman to press for more details, putting her right in the middle of all what she wanted, and while she’s off guard you take your moment; grabbing onto her face with one hand and forcing her to look you in the eye.

“Now stay away from _my husband_ ,” you almost spit with rage.

You bring your hand away from her face harshly, leaving red finger marks on her pale cheeks, and storm away with a new found confidence as you make your way back to your handsome man and the life that you’d waited so long for.


	11. Chapter 11

Your hand reaches out for the door handle but a strong grip on your wrist pulls your arm down, and you look to your right to see James standing there with a concerned look adorning his face.

“Why did you do that? Why have you put yourself in danger like that?” he asks in a hushed yet harsh tone.

“To protect my husband,” you frown, “James, you’re hurting me, let go!”

The door suddenly opens to reveal Samuel standing there with just the sheets from the bed tied loosely around his hips and James it quick to let go of your arm once he sees Samuel’s gaze fall upon his hand. As soon as you’re free from his grasp you enter the house and Samuel slams the door shut behind you both, then envelops you into his arms tightly.

“Are you okay my love?” he whispers softly.

“I am now that you’re holding me,” you reply as you press a kiss to his bare chest.

“What did he want?”

“He was scolding me for talking to Jocelyn, to get her to leave you alone by giving her the information she wanted. Everything seemed to align and I overheard Redwick and Farlow talking, then went straight to her to let her know what I’d heard,” you explain as your hands run up and down the sides of his muscular body.

“Why did he say you’ve put yourself in danger?” Samuel questions as he leans away to look into your eyes, searching for an answer.

“I… I may have done something that I didn’t think about. I felt so angry that she had tried to get you into trouble by spying for her, and I just… I took her face in my hand and told her to leave you alone,” you say timidly, ashamed at your own behaviour.

“You really shouldn’t have done that (Y/N),” he sighs, “what if this has diverted her attention to you now?”

“I don’t care if it has. As long as she leaves you alone, I don’t care what happens to me,” you state defiantly.

“But _I_ do!”

“Then you’d better not let me out of your sight,” you smile as you reach around to the base of your back and tug the laces of your fitted bodice free.

Samuel watches as you pull yourself free from the confines of your gown and let it fall to the ground to reveal your petticoat underneath which is swiftly discarded next to your dress, and he sweeps you up into his arms before carrying you into the bedroom and laying you down on the bed where he soon drops the sheet he’s wearing to the floor.

“Samuel!” you giggle as he kisses along your chest and the coarse hairs of his beard tickle your skin every time he moves.

The two of you sink into the bed as you become one again, and Mercy’s arrival home isn’t even noticed as you’re both so wrapped up in the act of love making, the noises coming from your room surely making the poor girl blush as she keeps as quiet as she can in her slightly merry state.

The next morning you wake to see the outline of your husband glowing from the sunrise that streams in through the window and your hand reaches out to him, your fingers gliding softly along his back, over his pert bottom, then down to his thigh where you’d been nestled against last night as he fulfilled all your desires. You’re so busy staring down at his lower half that you don’t even realise his eyes are now half open and looking at you with a sleepy smile tugging at his perfect lips.

“What are you thinking?” he mumbles, half into the pillow.

Your eyes meet his with a start and your fingers slowly walk back up his body until you’re able to sweep his hair back as he turns onto his side to face you properly.

“I’m thinking about how much I love every single bit of you,” you smile.

“Is that so?”

“It is my love,” you nod, “I’d like to show you just how much...”

“You’re insatiable,” Samuel grins.

“You’re irresistible,” you whisper as you move closer and capture his lips, “and of course, this is the only way to begin a family...”

“A family?!” Samuel gasps with excitement, “oh my love, to have a child with you would make happier than I thought I ever could be!”

He rolls you onto your back and moves on top of you as he laughs with delight, and then wastes no time in kissing you passionately as his hand moves down towards his length once more. You tilt your head to the side as his lips trail down over your jaw and neck, then you open your eyes to see Mercy standing next to your bed with her hand over her eyes.

“Mercy!” you gasp, pulling the sheet up to cover you both.

“I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry!” she babbles, “Mistress Castell I’m so sorry, and I don’t mean to disturb you both but I feel terribly ill Ma’am.”

“Oh Mercy,” you sigh, “go to your room and I’ll be right with you my dear.”

Samuel sticks his bottom lips out at you sadly as he rolls onto his back on his side of the bed and you make sure to kiss him before getting out and dressed to see how Mercy is doing.

“I think she had a little too much of what Verity was handing out last night,” you smile, “I’ll look after her.”

“Thank you,” Samuel smiles as he lazily reaches out for your hand as you come around to his side of the bed, “I’ll be out for a while today, there’s a meeting I need to attend.”

“Let us know when you’re leaving so I can kiss you goodbye,” you smile as you bring his hand up to your lips.

“I will do my love.”

You walk into Mercy’s room to find her heaving into a bucket and you rush to her side to gather her hair back from her face.

“Oh my dear, you poor thing!” you say softly as your arm slides around her shoulders to try and comfort her.

“I don’t know what was in those cups,” she says between retching, “but I don’t like it one bit!”

“Best to stay away from those cups in future my dear,” you whisper.

“Oh I’m so sorry Mistress Castell, I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Don’t be sorry,” you smile, “you can call on me any time you need me.”

“I once called on Miss Woodbryg and she told me never to do such a thing again. I’m so lucky to have a Mistress like you.”

“That’s because I think Miss Woodbryg is missing a heart,” you laugh quietly.

“I think she is,” Mercy giggles.

There’s a quiet tap at the door just before Samuel enters and you stand to greet him with a smile before he takes you in his arms.

“I’ll see you later,” he says as you kiss his cheek, “…I think you missed...” he grins, tapping his lips.

You correct yourself and press a kiss to his constantly needy lips, yours always equally as desperate for him as well, and then retreat back to where Mercy sits with her arms wrapped around the bucket.

“Feel better soon Mercy,” Samuel smiles as he backs out of the door.

“Thank you Master Castell.”

The rest of your day is spent looking after Mercy and doing the usual errands that she would, even though she insisted she was well enough to fetch water and vegetables when she very clearly wasn’t. You spotted James while collecting the pail of water but he stayed out of your way which was a huge relief, and you laughed to yourself as you witnessed Jocelyn worming her way in to the Yeardley household on your way home. Hopefully the information you shared would keep her at bay for a while and you could enjoy newly married life without any worries.

“Mercy, how are you feeling?” you call out as you enter the house again, “Mercy?”

You search the small dwelling but there’s no sign of Mercy anywhere and when you open the door to see if you can find her, you’re met with a large man holding a knife who forces his way into the house and covers your mouth when you begin to scream. Your limbs flail around as you try to hit out and kick at the man, but it’s useless against someone so big, and just as you close your eyes to accept your fate when he lifts the weapon, the weight of him disappears. When your eyes open to see what has happened you spot James with his arm wrapped around the man’s neck from behind as he drags him out of the house with immense force.

“Help!” you scream, getting the attention of the other men in the settlement who rush over to aid James.

Farlow and Redwick soon arrive as the man is held down on the ground by James and two others, then Yeardley and Samuel appear from the hall with Samuel running straight towards you.

“Where’s Mercy?! Where is she?!” you gasp as you grip onto Samuel’s coat in fright.

“I… I don’t know…” he mutters.

“Mistress Castell!” Mercy calls out as she comes running towards you both.

“Tell me what happened,” Redwick says as he comes to stand in front of you, “and we’ll make sure this man is put to justice.”

You all walk inside the house as the man is lead away to the cell and James joins you as you relay the events that had just happened to the Marshall.

“Mercy was sick. I… I went to fetch some water but when I got back she’d disappeared… I searched the house and then opened the door to go outside and see if I could find her, but that man… He was there with a knife, it all happened so quickly, he came towards me and then James was there pulling him away,” you explain as you shake in Samuel’s arms.

“Why did you leave the house Mercy?” Redwick asks.

“Because that man had knocked on the door and told me that Mistress Castell needed me just outside of the settlement,” she says quietly as tears fill her eyes, “I’m so sorry, so very sorry Master Castell.”

“And what made you come over Read?” he questions as he turns to face James.

“I was just passing. Saw the man and how he pushed his way into the house then ran over to stop whatever was happening,” he says, avoiding eye contact with everyone.

“I’ll try and find out why he did this, but if he isn’t willing to speak we’ll just have to hang him anyway,” Redwick says casually, mostly to Samuel.

“Right,” Samuel nods as Redwick leaves, the four of you now sat in a stunned silence.


	12. Chapter 12

Samuel shifts in his seat as he holds you and you watch as he looks directly at Mercy then flicks his eyes over to James who still sits with you all looking down at the gap between his legs, and Mercy takes her cue to help get him away from you both.

“Master Read, would you walk me to the well?” she asks.

“Of course,” he replies gruffly, then waits for Mercy to stand before following her towards the door, “I’m sorry this happened Mistress Castell,” he says just before he leaves.

As soon as that door shuts you curl against Samuel’s chest and begin to shudder with sobs as you finally let your emotions overwhelm you after holding them in for what seemed like such a long time.

“I’ve got you, I’m never letting go,” Samuel reassures as he rocks you back and forth gently to try and soothe you.

“I thought I was going to die,” you whisper.

“Try not to dwell on it my love, it’s over and justice will be done,” Samuel comforts.

His teeth are clenched while he holds onto you, a sudden desperate need to lash out overwhelming him as he thinks of what you’ve just been through, and a knock on the door makes you jump in his arms. Your pleading eyes tell him not to answer it so he shouts out for whoever it is to enter, his arms tightening around you as the door opens tentatively to reveal Redwick standing there with a stern expression.

“May I have a word recorder Castell?” he asks.

“Anything you have to say you can say in front of my wife.”

“I’m not sure this would be for such delicate female ears...”

“I cannot leave her,” he replies with a defiant shake of his head.

“This is quite urgent, I must insist.”

Samuel looks from you to Redwick and lets out a sigh as his grip loosens from around your torso reluctantly.

“Is there anyone out there to sit with her?” Samuel asks Redwick.

He turns to look out of the door and spots James walking past after leaving Mercy with Pepper, and he walks over to grab him by the sleeve and pull him towards the house where he’d sat only a few moments before.

“Sit with Mistress Castell while I speak to recorder Castell,” Redwick orders in his usual authoritative tone as he pushes him inside your house.

Samuel leaves a lingering kiss on your head then slowly rises from his seat and pulls the door shut as he steps outside with Redwick to talk, leaving you and James in an uncomfortable silence as he hovers next to your seat unsure of what to do or say.

“If you hadn’t-”

“But I was,” he interrupts as he slips into Samuel’s seat and cups your face with his hands, “I _was_ there, and you’re okay. That man will hang for what he did.”

“James, I… I don’t know what to say,” you reply as you stare into the man’s eyes.

They were glistening with tears as he looked into yours, every fibre of his being wanting to envelop you in his arms and take away your pain as his lips kissed your soft skin over and over until you both fell asleep. He was desperate for you since his feelings for Alice had started to wane after the realisation that he was projecting his love to try and save himself from the heartache of seeing you with Samuel.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers as tears pool at the edges of his eyes, “I’m so sorry (Y/N), about everything. Not fighting for you, the wedding day, _this._ I just wanted you to love me as much as I love you.”

Your head was swimming with everything that had happened so far today and James’ words were doing nothing to help your confusion as he sat there holding your face as if his life depended on it. All you could do was stare back at him in some sort of daze and when Samuel enters the house again it takes you both a few seconds to snap out of whatever sort of spell James had you under.

“You can go now,” Samuel says, prompting James to let go of you and quickly make his exit.

Samuel shuts the door behind him and lifts one hand to his forehead as he lets out a long sigh and fear rises in your body as you worry that he’s regretting ever getting involved with you.

“I’m so sorry Samuel,” you sob, “I didn’t mean to bring so much trouble to your door, I can’t apologise enough, I-”

“Shh,” he frowns, “do not utter another word. You have _nothing_ to apologise for. As long as we’re together and safe, I don’t care what happens in between. What did James say? It looked quite serious.”

“He said he was sorry for everything.”

“Everything?” he presses as he stays by the front door.

“Come and sit down,” you say as you pull your dress over onto your lap to make room for him next to you.

“I can’t at the moment, I’m… There’s things I need to think about.”

“Is this about was Redwick said?”

His eyes meets your briefly but look away as he struggles to answer your question truthfully so you get up from your seat and walk over to him, placing one hand on his chest and one on his cheek as you get him to meet your gaze again.

“What did he say?” you ask quietly.

“The man who attacked you admitted that he was hired by someone in the settlement,” he replies in a whisper.

“Jocelyn?”

“He said it was a man. They met only once under the cover of darkness in the forest outside Jamestown and the man was hidden under a cloak when he passed him money to carry out this attack, he only heard his voice once.”

“Could he identify the man from his voice?”

“He would’ve altered it as much as he could when speaking, and only said a couple of words,” Samuel replies as he shakes his head slowly from side to side.

“What’s going to happen to the man now?”

“There’ll be a hanging tomorrow.”

“Oh my goodness,” you gasp.

Samuel slides his hands around your body and pulls you in close as you rest your head against his chest and suddenly James’ words repeat in your mind; ‘I just wanted you to love me as much as I love you.’ There was an emphasis on the word ‘this’ when he apologised as well, and the thought that he could be behind all of this is enough to make you spring apart from Samuel in shock. You clutch your chest as you will these intrusive assumptions to leave your head, but the more that you wished them away, the stronger the connection between everything came.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” Samuel worries as he reaches towards you but you step away.

“I… It… The things that James said… I feel sick,” you say before throwing a hand up to your mouth as you struggle to breathe, and you soon drop to your knees.

“What did he say?” Samuel asks as he joins you on the floor and holds your upper arms tightly for support, “did he threaten you?”

“No, nothing like that, I’m not sure if I’m thinking logically at the moment but my mind has made some sort of link from what happened today to what he said to me.”

“Tell me everything my love, and we’ll work this out together. Come and sit with me, come on sweetheart.”

He helps you stand from the floor then tucks you into his side as you walk over to the seat again, and you stare at the floor when you sit down, trying to make sense of everything that was racing through your mind.

“He was apologising for everything, he said he was sorry for not fighting for me, for what happened on our wedding day, and for _this_. He said it with such an intensity. Then he said he just wanted me to love him as much as he loves me. I fear it means he-”

“He did this,” Samuel sighs.

“It sounds terrible to speak such things about him,” you say as you look up at Samuel sadly, “do you really think he’s capable?”

“I think that a man who has been without affection for the entirety of his life would be able to go to great lengths for the person he’s fallen in love with, and not necessarily think about the consequences of his hasty actions. This does not mean I condone his behaviour though, and I could kill him for what he’s done to you.”

“ _If_ he has.”

“We need to find out, and then inform the appropriate people so he can be punished accordingly,” Samuel says matter of factly.

“For organising something such as this, would he face the same punishment as the man who attacked me?”

“Yes, (Y/N), I imagine he would,” he says solemnly.

You inhale sharply as you think about James having to face the rope and your eyes convey to Samuel just how scared you are about finding out the truth.


	13. Chapter 13

When you and Samuel get into bed that night you know you’re in for a sleepless one, and as you sit up, staring into the darkness around you, your thoughts can’t help but immediately go to James. Could such a deeply caring person be capable of this? Was it really as Samuel said, that someone could go to these lengths just for another person to love them? Your stomach turns at the thought and you find yourself jumping out of bed to be violently sick in the nearest bucket you could find.

“(Y/N)? Is that you?” Samuel calls out after waking up with the noise of you retching, “(Y/N), are you okay?”

He lights a candle and finds you in the corner of the room huddled on the floor, then kneels down beside you and places a protective hand on your back. You look up at him out of the corner of your eye and shake your head to tell him how awful you felt, then turn back to the bucket as you vomit once more.

“Oh my love,” he sighs as he sits down properly, determined not to leave your side until you were able to get back into bed, “shall I get Mercy to call for the Doctor?”

“No, don’t worry,” you breathe between being sick.

“If you’re not better by morning, I’ll get him myself.”

“Please do not leave me.”

“I won’t,” he reassures with a defeated sigh.

Just as dawn begins to break you feel well enough to return to bed and Samuel sits up next to you, keeping a close eye on you as you drift off into an uneasy sleep. Mercy soon enters the room with her usual cheery disposition that you found so endearing, but Samuel manages to place a finger over his lips before she speaks, then points to you and over to bucket that desperately needed emptying. She nods and rushes over to the container to wash out, then Samuel mouths a thank you before she exits the room.

“Shh my love, you’re okay,” he soothes as you begin to stir.

He moves off of the bed as gently as he can as you settle down and he dresses quickly before sitting back down on your side and running his fingers through your soft hair with a pained expression on his face as worry overwhelms him.

“Master Castell,” Mercy whispers from the doorway.

Samuel turns to face her with a questioning look as she frantically gestures for him to join her, and he reluctantly leaves you for a moment to see what is so urgent.

“Marshal Redwick is here,” she whispers when he’s close enough.

He nods and thanks her, then Mercy takes his place by your bed side as he walks into the main part of the house to find Redwick standing there with a severe look on his face, and Samuel worries he’s found out something about James as you just had.

“The man refuses to give a name still, so we’ll have to proceed with the hanging regardless. I’m afraid we cannot rule out that it was James Read with all that has happened the last few weeks.”

“James Read?” Samuel asks as he feigns shock, “do you really think he’d be capable?”

Samuel knew that you both deserved to know the truth from the man himself before anyone went to the appropriate authority, so keeps up the appearance of being oblivious to such an accusation.

“I believe so,” Redwick nods.

Just then, the sound of you being sick again in the next room distracts the two men, and Redwick quickly makes his leave for Samuel to return to your side.

“Mercy, fetch the Doctor please,” he orders as he enters the room.

“No!” you protest.

“Yes,” Samuel replies in a harsh tone just as Mercy leaves, “I’m sorry, I just cannot bear to see you like this.”

A few minutes later Mercy and Doctor Priestley enter the house in haste, with Mercy babbling about how you’d been sick in the night and now this morning, and how she was very worried about you. She is such a kind soul and you smile inwardly at her concern.

“Thank you Mercy, that was very… Informative,” Christopher nods before walking around to your side of the bed where you sit on the edge wondering whether you’re going to be sick again or not.

“When did this begin?” he asks.

“During the night,” you reply weakly.

“Have you had anything to eat since it started?”

“Nothing, only sips of water.”

“Your temperature is a little high, it may be a stomach infection. I can give you something for it, take a sip once in the morning and another at night. If it doesn’t improve within a couple of days then do call on me again.”

“Thank you,” you smile as he leaves a small bottle of liquid on your night stand.

“I must admit...” Samuel begins as he comes to sit next to you, “...I was hoping it would be something other than an infection.”

“It’s too soon for that my love,” you chuckle, “it’ll happen quicker than you know it though, don’t you worry darling.”

You place a hand on his cheek and direct his gaze to you, then kiss his forehead and run your thumb gently over his stubble with a sigh. You were so deeply in love with this man that you would give him the moon if you could, and the way he looked so disappointed at the news that you weren’t pregnant yet broke your heart.

“Samuel,” you whisper, guiding his hand up and under your nightdress, “how about we try again?”

“Are you feeling well enough?” he asks as he hand breaks away from yours and begins to explore the warmth between your legs.

“Certainly well enough for you to make love to me,” you smile before gasping as his fingers slip inside you.

“Oh, (Y/N),” he groans, “oh my love.”

He gently guides you to lie down on the bed while he connects his sweet, soft lips to yours in a needy yet slow kiss, and he lifts your nightdress up and off of you with such ease that you barely move off of the bed. He’s quick to rid himself of his own clothes before he hovers over you teasingly, his elongated length brushing against your thighs as he periodically dips his head down to kiss your face and chest.

“Samuel,” you moan in desperation for him, “please.”

He lets out a staggered groan as he willingly obliges your pleas and eases himself gently inside you, then his eyes look directly into yours as he begins to move without causing you pain any more, and you brush his hair back from his face with your fingers so you can see his handsome features without interruption. His lips crash to yours after a shared loving look at one another and it’s only broken when the two of you can no longer hold in your moans of ecstasy as you both quickly reach the climax of your love making. The warm seed that fills you causes you both grin at one another as the hope of it making you into a small family spreads joy through both you and Samuel.

“I love you Samuel,” you sigh as he moves to lay next to you.

“I love you too (Y/N), so very much,” he smiles as he turns on his side and places a hand on your stomach, “you ignite something deep in my soul that I’ve never felt before. I’m so utterly enchanted by you.”

You blush under his gaze and move towards him so you can hide your face in his chest and wrap your arms around his muscular torso, then you kiss around his collar bone over and over again until you’ve melted into one another again, and you’re setting the pace as you sit astride him now with his hands massaging your breasts roughly. Once again you feel yourself beginning to tighten around his girth as your bodies begin to tire, the glistening sweat on both of you beginning to move across your skin and making you both shiver with the anticipation of what was to come, and eventually you both fall into a heap on the sheets with your chests heaving against one another.

“I can’t possibly do another thing today,” Samuel chuckles as his breathing steadies.

“Nor can I!” you laugh.

“How are you feeling?” he asks as he tilts his head down to see you resting on his chest.

“Better than earlier,” you smile, “you’ve taken very good care of me, but then you always do.”

“And you-”

“Samuel!” you gasp as you see a face at the window out of the corner of your eye and point towards it with a shaking hand.

“What is it my love?!” he asks as you move away from him to cover yourself, and he sits up on the bed.

“Someone was watching us, there was a face at the window!” you explain in a panic.

“Did you see who it was?” he asks as he makes his way over to the window and opens it up to look either side in case anyone was there.

“No, I… It was so quick.”

“Could it have been James?” Samuel asks with a frown as he turns back to you.

“I don’t think so, I would’ve recognised him, this person had dark hair.”

“Probably someone looking for something they can’t have,” Samuel sighs, “I’m so sorry darling. Only I should ever lay eyes on your naked body, no one else. You are _mine_.”

He returns to your side as you shiver at his forceful words that create a familiar feeling between your legs, and he moves the sheets you’d covered yourself with to one side so he can run his hand over your skin.

“ _Mine_ ,” he whispers again as you bite your lip.


	14. Chapter 14

A couple of weeks pass without any other incidents thankfully, but neither you or Samuel have plucked up the courage to see James about your suspicions on the planned attack, and it was beginning to become an ever increasing storm cloud above the two of you. Mercy could see the widening gap that was forming between you both and was getting more concerned by the day; trying to think of something to bring you back to the happy couple you were only a matter of days before.

Your head was swimming with all sorts of thoughts; worry about the bond between you and Samuel, concern for your body which seemed to be getting weaker by the day even though you were eating and drinking well enough, and then guilt for putting poor Mercy in the middle of this storm, the dear girl deserved none of this in all honesty. It was time for a break from the settlement and although it was against Samuel’s wishes you found yourself far from the town in the neighbouring woods where you found a nice spot down by the river to gather your thoughts alone.

It was a warm day and as you sat quietly in the shade you feel yourself becoming increasingly warmer by the second, the sweat dripping from your brow even though you were sitting completely still, and you know you need to make your way back to safety before something happens. You take a deep breath as you manage to stand by clawing onto the tree next to you, then you lean against it as your breath begins to escape at an alarming rate, and the next thing you feel is your body sliding down the bark to the floor of the woods, your mind semi-alert but your body completely frozen.

“Mistress Castell?” a voice questions as your eyes flicker shut, “Mistress Castell!”

Henry and Silas Sharrow carry your limp body between them back to Jamestown as fast as their feet will take them and they burst through the door of the Doctor’s home in a hurry just as you begin to come around again.

“What’s happened?” Priestley asks as they lift you onto a table.

“We were hunting in the woods and found Mistress Castell on the ground,” Silas explains, “she was alone.”

“Can you fetch Samuel?” the Doctor asks as he begins to open your eyelids and check you over.

Both Henry and Silas nod and turn to the open door where James stands with a forlorn expression across his face, and Silas is quick to push him back as he walks out. His hand lingers on the blacksmith’s chest as James attempts to push against him, but Silas is determined to keep him from you after hearing the rumours about his involvement in the attack from Alice. Even she had begun to distance herself from James since Redwick had been so obvious with his accusations, and Silas had been the one she turned to.

“Stay away,” he warns, “turn around and leave, Read.”

James huffs and heads back to his working shack, making sure he kept a close eye on the door to Priestley’s place as Henry and Silas went off to find Samuel. Mercy is the first person they come across and when she hears the news she runs straight to where you are after telling the two men where they can find the company recorder. Silas pushes open the two doors to the town hall with a bang and Redwick, Farlow, and Yeardley are all less than impressed with his interruption of their meeting, with Samuel looking up last to see Silas staring straight at him.

“Mistress Castell has fallen ill, we took her straight to Priestley after finding her in the woods alone...” he says, unable to say any more as Samuel rushes past him and into the street.

“Thank you,” Samuel calls back to the two brothers.

Samuel gets to within sight of the Doctor’s house until he’s distracted by James who stands next to his workshop watching the place intently, and he soon diverts to the blacksmith, pushing him against the wall he was next to.

“Was this your doing again?” Samuel asks, finally fed up with how this man has come between you both and prevented him from being with you when you fell ill, “well? Was it?!”

“No! I had nothing to do with this, I didn’t-”

“What about what happened before? Everyone’s heard the rumours. Is it true?”

James’ eyes drop straight to the ground giving Samuel the answer that he so desperately needed, and he leaves it at that for now as the worry of you takes over.

“Where is she?” Samuel pants as he enters Priestley’s house.

He nods to a corner where you’re sat on a chair while Mercy stands next to you picking leaves and twigs out of your hair after some colour has now returned to your cheeks after going completely grey, and Samuel drops to his knees in front of you with a relieved sigh. Your hands stop their fiddling with your dress and he brings them both up to his mouth where he kisses them each in turn before burying his head in your lap. You slip one of your hands from his and stroke his thick hair gently to comfort him, then you cup your hand under his chin and lift his head to look up at you as Mercy steps to one side.

“I’m with child, Samuel,” you whisper.

His jaw drops open as his eyes move from yours to your stomach and back up again, then he lets out a laugh as he lets his emotions get the better of him, and you begin to cry as you notice a stray tear leave his eye.

“This is the most joyous news!” he gasps, “a child of our own!”

“Let us keep it between ourselves for now my love,” you suggest quietly as Priestley gives you a knowing nod, “we’ll wait to tell everyone.”

“Of course,” Samuel grins, “we’ll keep it between us.”

He gets up off of the floor then turns to Priestley with a concerned face.

“What if she becomes unwell again?” Samuel questions, “what happened today?”

“It could happen as her body adjusts to such changes, but as long as she rests everything should be okay until the baby arrives.”

Until the baby arrives… You knew that all too well after knowing a couple of women who died during childbirth, and out here in the settlement with only one doctor your chances were probably even slimmer. The thoughts scare you but you push them out of your mind as soon as Samuel turns to you with that infectious smile of his.

“Mistress Castell,” Mercy says as she leans down to your ear, “I will look after you so well. And I cannot wait to help with the baby!”

“I have no doubt about it, Mercy,” you smile, “and the baby will be so lucky to have someone such as you in their life.”

“Mercy, we’ll meet you at home, I’d like to take a walk with my wife,” Samuel says with an unsure smile as he realises he needs to tell you about his encounter with James.

Even though this news had suddenly bought you back together as if nothing had happened, he knew that there would still be this underlying issue bubbling beneath the surface if he didn’t admit what he’d done, and now he had proof of what had happened then the consequences needed to be dealt with head on. He slips his arm through yours and you both walk to a quiet part of the settlement by the side walls, then he stops you before taking a look around and divulging the information.

“James did it,” he whispers sadly, “he was behind what happened to you.”

“How do you know?” you ask with a frown.

“Just before I came to see you I bumped into him and asked him outright if he had any involvement. His reaction was enough to tell me that he did.”

“What do we do now?” you gasp.

Samuel looks down to your belly and places a hand there before leaning in to kiss you, his lips capturing yours sweetly for the first time in days, and you weave a hand through his soft strands as you hold him there to enjoy the feel of him once more.

“We do whatever is best for you and the baby,” he replies when you finally part, “the last thing I want is the worry of a trial hanging over you while with child.”

“A trial that would surely only end one way...” you add.

Samuel nods solemnly and you let out a sigh before linking your arm through his to carry on walking home.

“Then it’s best if we say nothing,” you say quietly.

“Of course my love.”

The only problem with finding a supposed quiet place in Jamestown was that you could always be in ear shot of someone else, and it was especially an inconvenience when it was someone you specifically did not want eavesdropping on your private conversation; someone that now knew that James was responsible and that you were to have Samuel’s baby.


	15. Chapter 15

Marshal Redwick was the last person you expected to see at the door this morning, especially since Samuel had already left to meet Yeardley, but here he was with that familiar smirk that unsettled you to the core every time you saw it.

“Morning Mistress Castell,” he nods, “may I come in?”

“Of course,” you reply, standing aside for him to walk past you.

He sits down on one of the chairs while both you and Mercy exchange confused expressions, then she rushes off to get him a drink as you go and sit opposite him to see what he wants.

“Samuel’s not here, he-”

“I know,” he interrupts, “I’m not here for Samuel, I’m here to see you.”

“Right… How can I help?”

You place your hands in your lap as you wait for him to speak, but he takes his time as he smiles then looks around the room as if trying to unnerve you. Mercy returns to the room with a drink for him and hovers in the doorway so only you can see she’s there; it’s a comforting sight and you’re very thankful for it as you wait in an uncomfortable silence for him to say something.

“I hear you are with child,” he says, narrowing his eyes as he studies your reaction very carefully, “my sincere congratulations to you both.”

“Did Samuel tell you?” you ask, trying not to reveal anything via your expression.

“It’s strange sometimes… The things you hear while taking a simple walk inside the walls of Jamestown. Some people should be more careful with their words, you never know who may be listening in on such conversations.”

You stay silent with your unchanging features firmly fixed on him and whatever his next move would be.

“I know someone who would be very interested to know about your situation; the first child to be born in this settlement would of course belong to the _people_.”

You hold your breath as you wait for him to continue.

“Unless I keep this information to myself and allow others to think that someone else’s child is the first born. But for this there would be a price… I would need either you or your dear husband to admit what you know about James Read to the Governor.”

“So that he will be killed?”

“I can make it so there’s an appropriate punishment that does not result in death if you so wish, but I will need you to speak to Yeardley yourself about this and make no mention of my involvement.”

“On one condition.”

“Hmm?”

“Do not let him die.”

“Agreed.”

“What is the purpose of this?” you ask as he gets up to leave.

“There’s just something about him I hate,” Redwick shrugs.

“And what about Samuel, is he to know about this arrangement?”

“He is to know however much you share with him. It is not my place to inform him of such matters.”

With that he bids farewell and walks out of the door as if nothing had happened at all, so you turn to Mercy who looks to have the weight of the world on her fragile shoulders. It seemed Redwick had morals when it came to a marriage, yet not when a child was involved or another person’s life hangs in the balance.

“Mercy, it will work out for the best,” you reassure.

“Are you going to do as he says?” she questions as she steps out of the doorway.

“I have to,” you reply as you look down toward your stomach, “and I will tell Samuel of this conversation as well. Please do not worry yourself about this, Mercy.”

“I’ll try not to Mistress Castell,” she says meekly.

“Why don’t you go and see Pepper? I’m sure you could do with a break after hearing all that. Go on,” you encourage as you rub her arm gently, “everything will be okay Mercy, I promise you.”

She eventually leaves after a little more persuading and when you’re left alone you lay down on the bed with your forearm across your eyes and your free hand over your stomach; taking in the conversation that had just happened between you and Redwick. Why on earth did he have such a vendetta against James, and why should you have to get involved with his desperation to punish him? Your thoughts get out of control and honestly make you feel a bit dizzy, but you know you must do one thing; warn James of what is to come.

It would look far too obvious if you walked over to his right now to tell him, and getting either Mercy or Samuel to tell him he needs to visit would also arouse suspicion, so you needed someone who wasn’t involved to get a message to him secretly instead. You wait by the window, keeping yourself just hidden out of sight until the right person came along, and when you spot Verity heading towards the house, you take your chance and call her inside.

“Verity!” you hiss through the partly open front door, “Verity!”

“Well this is unlike you to be whispering through doorways,” she laughs as she stops and comes in at your urgent gesture.

“I am not myself at all,” you sigh, “I will owe you the world if you do this one thing for me...”

“The world, eh?”

“The world,” you nod.

“Can’t say no to that now can I?” she winks, “what do ya need lovey?”

“If you come across James Read on your travels, could you ask him to visit Samuel and I?”

“Well that’s a very simple request...”

“Just make sure Redwick doesn’t see you, and please ask James to be aware of him too.”

“Of course,” Verity nods, “is everything okay?”

“I’m hoping it will be,” you reply with an unsure look across your face.

Verity was one of few trusted allies you and Samuel could rely on, and you knew that she could tell there was more to this than you were letting on, but now was not the time for lengthy explanations.

“I will be sure to explain when all this is sorted and please do not forget to find me whenever you need me,” you say as you open the door for her.

“Look after yourself (Y/N), you look a little pale these days,” she replies sadly as she tucks your hair behind your ear before leaving.

Samuel arrives home soon after Verity leaves and you’re quick to fill him in on all that has happened while he was out, and he’s less than impressed with Redwick’s move to see you without Samuel knowing. There’s an anger inside him these days, barely noticeable to most, but to you it was quite obvious when you looked into his eyes and saw the beautiful blue turn dark and stormy within seconds.

“If James sees us tonight, I will go to Yeardley first thing tomorrow morning so we can put this behind us,” you explain.

“Why us?” Samuel despairs.

“I don’t know, my love. Maybe it is because we haven’t adhered to the proper ways of becoming a couple, maybe someone is punishing us for falling for one another when we should have resisted all urges, but I don’t care. It has to end some how and if this is how we do it then so be it. I will do anything in my power to be with you and raise a family together,” you say earnestly.

Samuel’s fingers tangle themselves into your hair as he brings your face towards him so he can press his lips to your forehead; the scruff of his beard tickling your skin softly. Your eyes look down at the scattering of hair that peeks out from his tunic and that’s all it takes for a familiar feeling to grow within you.

“Mercy will be a while at Pepper’s,” you say as you tilt your head up to look at him; your eyes darting down to his chest and back up again quickly.

A smile grows across his face at this fact and he shuffles back on the chair to allow you to sit astride him, and soon enough your clothes are being strewn across the floor as Samuel worships your body once more.


	16. Chapter 16

Was this all your fault? Would Redwick have such a vendetta against James if you hadn’t left him, or would he have had the same irrational hatred for you as well? You’d never know now and you couldn’t dwell on it as you stood peeking through the small gap in your curtain, trying to see if James was on his way or not.

“Any sign?” Samuel asks as he walks into the bedroom with a worried look upon his face.

“Not yet,” you sigh, gently tilting your head until it rests against the wall.

He moves to your side and places one hand on the small of your back while the other comes to a gentle stop on your small bump, then he presses a kiss against the side of your head as you now lean into his body, and you take a deep breath at the comforting feel of his arms around you.

“Maybe Verity hasn’t had a chance to-” Samuel begins, but cut off by a quick knock at the door before it opens and James appears just beyond the doorway to your bedroom.

You stand upright with a start and Samuel follows only a step behind you as you make your way towards James when he shuts the door quietly, and there’s an awkward moment as you stare silently at one another; him already noticing a change in your face from your pregnancy.

“You look different,” he mumbles.

“I...”

“She’s unwell, Redwick has put her under unnecessary pressure recently, and it’s why we’ve called you over,” Samuel interrupts as he moves to stand in front of you, “I need to go to Yeardley in the morning and tell him everything we know about you and the man you hired to attack (Y/N). Redwick will make sure you’re not hanged for your crime, but the safety of our family depends on this, and _you_ are not standing in the way of me protecting them.”

James nods before leaning to the side to see your frightened face behind Samuel’s protective body, and his eyes travel down to your stomach as he realises why you look so different this evening.

“You’re with child?” he asks, looking directly into your eyes.

“I am,” you nod, “and we cannot let our child become property of the people of Jamestown.”

“I understand,” James sighs, “you’re a decent man for letting me know Samuel.”

“Decency has nothing to do with it, it was (Y/N) who wanted to warn you of what was to come even though this act is dangerous in itself,” Samuel states, “I will go to the Governor first thing, so be prepared.”

“Will do,” he nods, “thank you.”

James leaves as quickly as he came in and you take a seat on the chair with an audible huff as you dress puffs up around your legs, then Samuel kneels in front of you to take your hands in his.

“I promise everything will be okay,” he says as his eyes bore into yours.

A non-committal hum is your only reply to him as you wonder who else in the settlement could be carrying a child and whether they would hopefully give birth before you do, as the thought of having little control over your baby churns you up inside, and tears prick your eyes as you meet Samuel’s intense gaze.

“What is it?” he questions.

“I’m scared Samuel, if the Governor’s wife finds out our news then I fear that we won’t even be able to name our own child. It’s bad enough thinking that everyone is against us being together anyway.”

“That will not happen,” he replies sternly, “I simply won’t allow it.”

The two of you go to bed together but after a short sleep next to Samuel you find yourself wandering around the house aimlessly as you stroke your aching stomach with care, unsure of whether to go and wake the doctor or wait until the settlement begins to stir. Mercy finds you first thing in the morning as you swing back and forth in the rocking chair, and she rushes to your side, knowing that something was wrong.

“Mistress Castell,” she gasps, “my, you look ever so pale!”

“I just didn’t sleep much Mercy,” you smile weakly.

“Shall I get the doctor? Or shall I wake Master Castell? Miss, you do not look well at all,” she worries as her hands shake while she holds one against your forehead to check your temperature.

“What’s all this?” Samuel yawns as he appears from the bedroom.

“Mistress Castell hasn’t slept all night, Sir, and she does not look at all well,” Mercy explains, “she’s so very cold.”

“Mercy, please go and fetch the doctor,” Samuel instructs as he moves towards you and pulls a chair next to yours, “why didn’t you sleep my love?”

“I just didn’t feel tired,” you shrug, “no reason in particular,” you lie as your fingers tighten on top of your stomach.

“As soon as Priestley arrives I will visit Yeardley and get this over and done with, it surely cannot be helping your fragile state,” he frowns, “are you in pain?”

“It’s not a pain, more of an ache...”

“Your stomach?”

“Mhmm.”

Samuel stands in a panic, his hands going straight to his hair as he weaves his fingers through it nervously and his long legs take him from one end of the room to the other as he begins to pace in front of you silently worrying. Priestley soon arrives behind a jittery Mercy and Samuel watches intently as he examines you even though you repeatedly tell him to leave and see Yeardley.

“Master Castell,” Mercy whispers as he begins to pace once more, “I think you’re making Mistress Castell nervous...”

He looks over to your troubled face and he realises he’s not making the already precarious situation any better.

“Come and fetch me from the Governor’s quarters if anything happens,” Samuel instructs quietly.

“Thank you Mercy,” you smile as Samuel leaves as quietly as possible.

“Tell me if I hurt you,” Priestley says as he begins to press firmly around your stomach.

“Ah!” you cry out, and he checks around the area before looking at you with a solemn expression.

“What is it? Is it the baby?” you gasp.

“As far as I can feel the baby is fine, this is your kidney and I believe there are some stones in it if it is causing you this much pain.”

“Well what do I need to take?”

“There’s nothing you can take… But if they increase in size and cause you more pain then you’ll require surgery to remove them.”

“Surgery?” you and Mercy both question at the same time.

“Surgery,” he nods apologetically.

Mercy begins to cry at the thought of it all, and you have to bite back your own tears as you scramble to get up and wrap your arms around her small frame to try and reassure her that everything will turn out for the best, even though you were now suddenly faced with your own mortality and that of your child’s. Christopher squeezes your shoulder as he whispers that he’ll be there if you need him and to check in each week for an examination, then he leaves you both in a tight embrace, the both of you needing as much comfort as the other.

“No!” Samuel gasps when he returns to see you both now crying, “no!”

Mercy pushes you away and towards Samuel to explain, and you have to fight to get your words out properly instead of sobbing.

“Christopher said he believes I have kidney stones… There’s nothing I can take for them, and if they get bigger and cause more pain then they’ll have to come out,” you manage to clarify, “the baby is fine.”

“But for them to come out he’ll have to...” he trails off, knowing exactly what this meant, “oh no, no, I can’t lose-”

He’s cut off by a sob that rocks his body against yours, and you squeeze your eyes shut as you wish that you’d never come out here to Jamestown, to the constant heartache you’d felt here, and the uncertainty of everything, but as Samuel’s arms tighten around you, you know that you would rather spend the rest of your life with him rather than go back on it all, even if it meant that it would be less time than you thought.


	17. Chapter 17

Your body felt weak, your mind was racing at an alarming pace, and every tiny twinge of pain caused you to panic as you wondered if your time would come now. Your thoughts drift back to being on the ship from England and one of the crew having to have a fishing hook dug out of their abdomen; the screams from the man were deafening even though the men shoved old rags between his teeth and there was no escape from the sound in such an enclosed space, then all went quiet when he eventually passed out from the pain, never to wake again. That was only trying to retrieve something that was just underneath the skin, so surely to have to delve so far into the body for kidney stones you stood no chance at all. You turn away from Samuel in bed as you cry quietly into your pillow at the thought of leaving him behind, but you’re determined to at least give birth before anything has to be done, you refuse to put your baby’s life at risk.

“My love, what is wrong?” Samuel gasps quietly as he wakes to find you sobbing next to him.

He wraps an arm around you immediately and pulls you against his strong and comforting body as you continue to let your fears overwhelm you.

“Please, (Y/N), tell me what is on your mind,” he pleads as he presses a long kiss to your head.

“Oh Samuel, we should not have acted upon our feelings, you should have stayed with Jocelyn and I with James then maybe we would have escaped this wretched punishment God has put upon us for defying the laws of the settlement.”

“Do not say such things!” Samuel frowns as he holds you close, “I would have been unable to live if I had to see you and James together every day, it would have torn me apart. This is no punishment, this is a test my love, a test that we shall face and conquer together to prove our love for one another and show everyone this was the right thing to do.”

“Samuel,” you begin with a sigh, turning around in his embrace so you can face him, “will you promise me one thing?”

“Anything.”

“If something happens after our baby is born, please tell them about me and how much I loved and wanted them.”

Samuel opens his mouth to protest against your dark thoughts but a sob escapes instead and his mouth closes as his lips turn down while tears spill from his enchanting eyes, and you rest your forehead against his as you cup one of his cheeks gently. After a few minutes together in a sombre silence Samuel’s lips find yours for a kiss that takes your breath away as one of his hands travels down your body to pull your nightdress up, and he begins to comfort you in a way only he could. You both manage to slip out of your clothes trying not to break the kiss for too long, then Samuel gently pushes you down onto your back before settling his lower body between your open legs and carefully sliding inside your slick opening.

His name falls softly from your lips as he leaves a trail of kisses along your jaw and down your neck while his hips move in unison with yours, burying himself deep inside you with every thrust, and Samuel’s touch is much more delicate than when you’d made love before announcing you were with child. The sound of deep breathing fills the small space around the bed and the air soon turns thick and heavy as the sweat beads across both your bodies, and you wrap your legs around Samuel’s hips so your heels can aid him by pressing against his buttocks. Your hands glide along his back then up to his shoulders so you can hold him close to you as his hot breath stutters out onto your neck between chaotic kisses, and he soon calls your name out repeatedly while you brace yourself for your own high; lifting your hips off of the bed as much as you can to ride out the pleasurable pulses that take over inside.

“I love you,” Samuel whispers as he pulls out and strokes your stomach with both hands while kneeling between your legs, “and this little one.”

“I love you too Samuel, so very much.”

He moves to lay beside you once more and his broad chest is far too inviting for you to resist draping yourself across it, then you hear Mercy pottering around in the next room as your eyes finally shut after spending most of the night awake. When Samuel knows you’ve drifted off to sleep he carefully moves from beneath you to get to the meeting that was being held this morning between the Governor, Redwick and Farlow about the situation with James.

“Good morning Mercy,” he smiles as he emerges from the bedroom once fully presentable, “(Y/N) is still asleep after having a bad night. Could you check in on her every now and again please?”

“Of course Master Castell,” she nods willingly, “do you need me to fetch the doctor?”

“No, not necessary Mercy, but thank you. Just keep an eye on her while I’m out and that will be enough. I’ll be back soon.”

“Bye Master Castell.”

Samuel takes his seat as company recorder but keeps his head down as he takes the notes from the meeting, too worried to look up as the three men discuss what to do with James Read.

“Punishment should be the same for him as it was for the attacker, should it not? This was a planned event,” Farlow suggests.

“I agree,” Yeardley nods.

Samuel’s eyes dart to Redwick, silently urging him to defend James after his agreement with you, and he smirks as he allows a longer pause than Samuel would like.

“I disagree. If he admits to it, then I see no harm in a simple whipping. The length of which should be decided by Master Castell of course,” Redwick sneers, “one or two days should do it.”

Samuel’s gaze widens in horror at such an offer, he was not a violent man in the slightest and it was something he chose not to witness either if he could help it, and now here he was, possibly in charge of someone’s length of punishment.

“Hmm, would that be suitable, recorder?” Yeardley questions.

“I… Yes of course it would. An afternoon should suffice.”

“ _Just_ an afternoon, Castell?” Redwick pushes.

“A day then,” Samuel replies hurriedly, moving his quill along the parchment to try and keep up with what had been said.

“Excellent, I shall look forward to the spectacle tomorrow!” Redwick grins.

Samuel walks home with a heavy heart as he prepares to tell you what had happened during the meeting but is quickly interrupted by James as he leaps from his shack to stop the recorder in his path.

“What is my fate?” he asks quietly.

“One day of whipping,” Samuel sighs, “I did suggest an afternoon but Redwick has a particularly nasty vendetta against you and soon changed it.”

“Thank you,” James nods, “you are a kind man Master Castell, and I am forever in your debt.”

Samuel gives the man a curt smile before continuing to the house and opening the door with a forced smile only to find Mercy worrying in a chair at the fact that you had gone missing.

“What’s happened Mercy?” Samuel asks as he studies her shaking frame.

“Mistress Castell… I turned away for only a moment after she dressed and when I turned back she had gone! I don’t know what to do! I ran outside but there was no sign of her Sir.”

“How odd. Do you think she has gone to get some food or maybe some medicine?”

“I told her I would do that for her with her being in such a fragile state, I promise I did Master Castell!” Mercy says as tears prick her eyes for fear of him not believing her.

“I know, I know,” he soothes, “did you hear a knock at the door maybe?”

“I don’t think so… Oh, I can’t remember, I’m so mixed up with worry inside Sir, I’m ever so sorry!”

“It’s okay Mercy, it’s not your fault. Have some water and calm down while I go out and see if I can find her, okay?”

“Yes Master Castell, thank you,” she nods as her shaking hands reach for the arms of the chair to help her stand.

Samuel stands outside the front door with a perplexed look upon his face as his eyes scan the settlement for any sign of you but of course there is none in such close proximity to the house, so he begins to walk towards the gates of Jamestown, being sure to study any path that he passed on his way. Several people greet him along his short journey and he makes sure to maintain his polite nature, but he can’t help the trepidation that rises inside him as he walks increasingly further from the safety of the colony.

“It’s unusual to see you so far from Jamestown Master Castell,” Pepper frowns as he walks towards the worried man.

“I am unable to fin my wife, have you seen her on your travels?”

“Of course,” Pepper laughs, “Mistress Castell is with Alice at our land!”

“Goodness, thank you!”

Samuel picks up his pace until he’s almost running up to the Sharrow land, then when you finally come into view he stops to catch his breath before taking a slow walk over to where you and Alice stand talking, and his eyes are drawn to the large bump that protrudes from Alice’s dress.

“Samuel!” you cheer as he gets near enough for you to notice, “I’m so sorry I left without telling you were I was going, but once I heard the good news I could not resist coming to give my well wishes to Alice in person!”

You link your arm through his as he presses a kiss to your hair then he grins at Alice as he realises you were here to see how far along she was and whether it would be her that was to give birth to the first child of Jamestown.

“Our very best wishes on your joyous news,” Samuel nods, “it will be wonderful to begin to see children around the settlement!”

“That it will,” Alice agrees, “I shan’t keep your wife any longer, I must get back to helping Silas myself! Good day to you both.”

“And to you too Alice,” you smile.

You both turn away ready to walk back to Jamestown, and your hand runs up and down Samuel’s arm happily.

“Our news can be kept a secret for a little longer my love,” you whisper excitedly.

“I’m so very relieved,” Samuel sighs, “after this morning I need some good news.”

“What was the verdict?” you ask, stopping in your tracks to face him.

“A days whipping.”

“Oh my goodness,” you gasp, bringing up a hand to cover your mouth.

“Redwick gave me the choice of length for the punishment and I did try for an afternoon but…”

“No, no, I know you would have done your best Samuel, you always do.”

You stand on tiptoe to kiss him, then stroke his cheek to help ease his troubled mind.

“We should get back, poor Mercy was shaking with worry over you!” he chuckles.

“The poor thing! I must apologise to her!” you say before lifting your dress a little so you could walk quicker.

“Hey!” Samuel laughs from behind as he jogs to catch up with you.

You turn and give him a sly smile before picking up your pace and the two of you end up laughing all the way back to the settlement as he chases you through the dense woods; the light relief something you both so desperately needed.


	18. Chapter 18

The two of you walk through the gates with beaming faces, your arm linked through his as you rest your cheek on his shoulder, but your joy soon turns to concern as you see the crowds that had gathered in the middle of the settlement, and the pained cries that call out after the sound of leather against skin make you wince each time you hear them. Samuel’s free hand comes up and holds your face against his arm to prevent you from seeing anything, but Redwick is quick to spot the two of you and halt you in your tracks.

“You’re missing it! Come with me, I’ll take you to the front of the crowd!” he declares, grabbing Samuel’s arm and dragging you both through the throng of people.

“I thought this would start tomorrow,” Samuel states to a joyous Marshal.

“There’s no time like the present dear Samuel! Don’t you want to see the man behind your dear wife’s attack punished? And Mistress Castell, do you not want to see him get what he deserves for launching such an atrocious man upon you? What if it had gone awry and he had not intervened in time? You could be dead.”

You look up at Samuel, unable to turn to face the source of the anguished groans coming from only a short distance away, but Redwick walks around to you and forcefully turns your head to meet James’ pleading gaze which is directed straight at you; the Marshal’s large fingers hurting your jaw as he holds you in place.

“Let her go!” Samuel snaps, then quickly pulls you away from everyone and through the crowd back to your house where Mercy waits on the step with tears in her eyes.

“Oh Mercy,” you sigh, “come inside, don’t listen to what’s happening dear girl.”

You skip ahead of Samuel to take her in your arms and lead her back into the dwelling so she can no longer hear the grunts and whips that alternate outside, then sit her down on a chair and make her some tea to ease her fragile mind.

“I’ll do that Mistress Castell, I don’t want to be a bother, you need to rest, I-”

“Mercy, it’s tea,” you smile, “I can manage to make tea.”

Samuel stands with his back against the door as he looks on at you bustling around to make sure Mercy is okay, and his face falls at the spectacle that was happening outside your four walls. Just as you’d received the good news that you wouldn’t be the first couple in Jamestown to give birth, you’re faced with the utterly horrid sight of James facing his punishment earlier than agreed, and Redwick just _had_ to rub your faces in it for his own enjoyment.

“Samuel, you look worried my love,” you frown after handing Mercy her drink.

You place your hands upon his cheeks to focus his distant stare on your eyes and he gives you a half hearted smile as he lifts his arms and takes a hold of yours gently.

“Are you not worried?” he questions quietly.

“Of course I am. James is out there being beaten because of me. How could I not worry? I’m the one who put him in this position, I deserve to be punished for it.”

“No you don’t,” he says, shaking his head from side to side.

“Maybe I do though…” you gasp, realising that maybe if you stood by as witness to what was happening to James, no matter how much it pained you to watch, then maybe you’d be forgiven, “Samuel, I have to see him. If I do this then we could be free from hurt, and our sins would be forgiven.”

“Are you feeling quite well my love?” he asks with concern furrowing his brow.

“I feel as if I need to do this Samuel, do you trust me?”

“Implicitly sweetheart.”

“Then I must go and see him until his punishment is over,” you nod, mostly to yourself.

“(Y/N), I-” Samuel starts, but you’ve already moved past him and slipped out of the gap in the front door before he can get another word out.

You slowly push your way to the front of the crowd, your eyes turned down to the ground as you try and prepare yourself for what you were about to witness, and then when you no longer see feet in front of you, you manage to lift your gaze towards the origin of those awful noises you were hearing. There stood James with his eyes trained on you straight away, his body convulsing each time he’s hit with the whip, and you watch as he tries to mouth something to you.

“Come to see the bad man get what he deserves?” Jocelyn asks smugly from beside you.

“I’ve come to face my own punishment,” you reply softly.

“Your punishment for what?”

“Acting upon unlawful feelings for another man.”

“Ha!” she laughs, “power is what I want, not a man. Samuel was nothing more to me than a step up in the ranks, but he didn’t even have the balls for that so I simply couldn’t live like that anyway.”

“So why the assault in the woods? Why get me to feed you information?”

“I thought it would be a fun little game. I mean, you were in the wrong, but you didn’t have to know that I didn’t care just yet...”

You briefly turn your head to see her haughty expression as she takes in the sight of James being punished with a smile, and you frown as you turn back to the poor man.

“And this was my idea anyway,” she sighs, “such a shame he got found out.”

“What?”

“I told him that to try and steal your affections back he must make a bold statement, save your life or something to make you fall into his arms. It was almost too easy to convince him, he was so desperate for you I actually almost felt sorry for him.”

“You really are something else, aren’t you?” you scoff, “so who’s your target now then?”

“Dear Christopher seems sweet on me, and as a Doctor he would know more than most when it came to the men who control this settlement. I could use that to my advantage.”

Your eyes convey your worry that he would let slip information about you, but Jocelyn simply waves her hand dismissively and laughs.

“Don’t worry, you and Samuel have done your jobs for me, I only have interest in them now,” she says, nodding towards where Redwick, the Governor, and Farlow, “they hold the key to power.”

“Were you hoping this would happen to James then? To gain the trust of Redwick?”

“Oh, she’s clever, too!” Jocelyn gasps, “of course. I tell James what to do, James gets found out, and the dear Marshal over there gets what he wants… Thanks to _me_.”

“Congratulations,” you mutter.

“So I wouldn’t worry about punishing yourself by watching James all day, as you have nothing to be punished for. Just look at me, I seem to be doing fine!” she laughs before walking away into the crowd again.

The sound of the whipping suddenly stops as the man carrying out the punishment pauses to change hands and take a sip of water, and you hear James ask if he may have a drop himself but all he receives is a laugh as the man puts a cup just out of reach. You’re quick to run forwards and pick it up so you can tip some moisture into his mouth as you wipe some of the dirt from his sweat covered face with your handkerchief.

“Why did you come back?” he whispers.

“I… don’t know,” you lie, shaking your head and feeling thoroughly stupid.

“Your sweet face is the only thing getting me through this (Y/N), but please leave, go back to Samuel, you must not be witness to such- ah! Go!” he cries as the whipping resumes.

You jump back from him in shock as the punishment suddenly continues and you stand with the crowd, your eyes wandering over to where Jocelyn now stood talking to Marshal Redwick, obviously telling him of her scheming in hopes of forming some sort of alliance so she can further climb the ladder of Jamestown. It all goes awfully though as Redwick laughs in her face while he tells her to leave him alone, and she purses her lips before storming off in a huff, which you can’t help but smile at. A dull ache in your abdomen reminds you that you were already facing some sort of wrath from the powers above, and as your mind wanders to what would happen if you were to die while you back away from the sight of James, you’re suddenly stopped by the Governor’s wife who appears beside you with a breathless pant.

“Mistress Castell,” she breathes rather urgently, “have you heard of Alice Sharrow’s news?!”

“I have!” you beam, “it’s wonderful isn’t it?”

“It’s a miracle,” she sighs happily, “the first child of Jamestown! Oh, how the people will love them.”

“It will certainly bring joy to the settlement.”

“And it shouldn’t be too long until you have your own news to share,” she smiles, “family is so very important, and we need to lay our roots down.”

“I’d be honoured to carry Samuel’s child,” you nod, “and to have a family of our own would bring me so much happiness.”

“You look a little pale Mistress Castell, do make sure you’re keeping well especially if you are planning to have a baby. Maybe see Doctor Priestley to make sure everything is okay? How about I come with you?” she suggests, trying to take over your whole body it seems.

“I will make sure I go with Samuel,” you smile as politely as you can muster, “thank you for your concern.”

“Good… good! Have a good day.”

“And you!”

You walk back to the house and enter the door with a faint smile playing on your lips as you think about the Governor’s wife and how controlling she was, then you notice Samuel and Christopher sitting in a now solemn silence at the table with their heads turned and focused on you.

“Are you okay my love?” you gasp, rushing towards Samuel and taking his head in your hands as you examine his face carefully.

“I am well,” he sighs, placing his hands over yours and bringing one of them to his mouth so he can kiss your palm, “we’re just… we…” tears prick his eyes as he struggles to finish his sentence, and Christopher takes over.

“We were discussing any procedure that might have to happen if your situation were to worsen and I’d have to intervene.”

“What would it entail?” you ask quietly.

“I would have to make an incision-”

“This is not for her ears, Christopher,” Samuel hisses.

“No, I need to hear what will happen,” you say as you move away from Samuel and lean against the wall.

“I would make an incision in your abdomen to reach through to your kidney where I would then need to make a hole big enough to fit my equipment in and remove each stone one by one before sewing you up again. You will pass out from the pain of it eventually, and there is a high risk of infection afterwards. I have not done this sort of procedure before… and if you were to still be with child then I fear the baby would not survive due to the trauma inflicted upon your body,” he explains calmly.

Your legs begin to shake beneath your weight and before you know what’s happening you’ve slid down the wall and landed on the floor as the colour drains from your face.

“(Y/N)!” Samuel gasps, dropping to his knees to help you.

“I’m fine,” you whisper unconvincingly, “I’m fine.”


	19. Chapter 19

Christopher twists a rag then places it across your mouth just before you bite down to secure it in place and muffle your pained screams while you hold Samuel’s hand with a vice like grip, and he worries as he looks down at your pale and sweaty face. Your knees are high in the air, your bottom half free of any covering as your night dress sits crumpled at your waist, and every now and again Christopher leans to the side to check the progress of the baby’s head; it was all very undignified but necessary that he was here due your increasingly worrisome kidney stones. Samuel’s eyes dart around from your face to between your legs, then to Christopher’s face for some kind of reassurance that everything was okay, but all he sees is more worry mirrored at him and he squeezes your hand intermittently to make sure you know he’s still there. Your pants sound like growls as they travel around the cloth in your mouth but at least when you cry out in pain as the baby moves further out of you the sound is slightly softened, even if it is no less disturbing to all those who can hear.

You spit the cloth out of your mouth, “I can’t… I can’t do it…” you groan, shaking your damp head from side to side in turmoil.

“You’re doing so well my love, they’re almost here!” Samuel encourages, “just a while longer, and then it will be over I promise.”

“Please...” you beg breathlessly as another contraction washes over you, “please!”

Samuel reluctantly places the rag back in your mouth as your body readies and as you put your chin down onto your chest and push with all your might you let out one long grunt until finally you hear the sounds of crying from between your thighs, then Christopher fusses with the baby until he lifts it over your knees and places it gently on your chest with a smile.

“A healthy baby boy,” he grins, looking between you and Samuel, “my sincerest congratulations to you both.”

The saliva sodden rag that had just been in your mouth sits at your side and dampens your nightdress as you look down in wonder at your little boy, and just as Christopher helps you to deliver the rest of the birth you gasp as a pain emanates from your side, and you quickly hand your baby to Samuel.

“Christopher, is this normal?” you wince as you writhe around in pain.

“Uh… no… everything went as planned and I can only assume this is your kidney. I feared this would happen after your body has been through such an event. Samuel, I need your help.”

“Wait,” you gasp, grabbing onto Samuel’s forearm and leaning over to see the baby, “mummy loves you so much, my beautiful little boy, you’re so perfect. Daddy will look after you,” you kiss his head gently as a tear falls down your cheek, then you nod for Samuel to take the boy to Mercy while Christopher opens up his bag and gets the instruments ready.

“How is the pain now?” he asks, holding up his scalpel.

“Worse… it’s getting worse…”

Samuel returns, wiping his eyes with his palms, then he unbuttons his jacket and hangs it over the back of his chair as he prepares for something he never thought he’d have to do. You pick up the old piece of cloth yourself and bite down on it so as not to scare Mercy next door, but in this case it’s almost completely useless as your screams pass the fabric and fill the room with a deafening tone. Samuel looks away for a moment as he attempts to compose himself but it’s no use as Christopher asks him to hold you down as tightly as he can so that your movement is minimised for him to make the incision.

“I love you,” you whisper as Samuel reluctantly takes a hold of your arms and stands over your body to pin them to your sides.

“I love you too, you’ll be okay my love. We have so much to look forward to with our boy, we must name him, then have the christening, and the whole of the settlement will join us to celebrate, just as they did with Alice and Silas,” he smiles, trying to take your mind off of what was about to happen, “it will be such a joyous occasion!”

You begin to nod but a shriek breaks through the silence as Christopher presses the blade of the scalpel into your skin to gain access to your kidney, and after a few minutes of constant pained cries as you fight against Samuel’s hold, you suddenly fall silent and your body goes completely limp beneath his hands. It’s then that Samuel begins to cry freely, his hands coming up to his face to hide his tears, but stopping when he realises one of them is covered in your blood, and all he does is stare at the thick red liquid that’s stained his hand.

“Samuel, it’s just the pain, she’s still with us,” Christopher reassures, finally spotting the large stones that had been causing you issue and beginning to lift them out, “I need you to check her pulse on her neck and if she comes around before I’ve finished you’ll need to hold her down again.”

“I don’t think I can,” he sighs sadly, “this is too much.”

“You can! And you will!” the doctor insists, “do you want to help the woman you love?”

“Of course I do!”

“Then you’ll do it!”

Samuel realises he’s only snapping to get him into the right frame of mind and he steps towards you to carefully removed the cloth from your mouth and place two fingers on the side of your neck to check your pulse. It’s slow and shallow, but it’s there and it means you’re alive. For now. He hears the baby crying from the next room as if he knows that his mother is in danger, and then Mercy begins to sing a sweet lullaby to the little one, soothing both him and Samuel during this traumatic time. Only minutes ago you were both overwhelmed with joy at the arrival of your baby and now here Samuel was, preparing himself to hold you down again if you woke during this possibly deadly procedure.

“One more,” Christopher mutters as he begins to sweat.

He was just as scared as Samuel was, if not more, being as this was his first time performing this type of operation; he’d only ever witnessed one before and the outcome was no a success so he had his own reservations about carrying it out, but you would certainly die if he didn’t even try to help.

“I’m closing her up now,” he updates as Samuel stares at your face that looks completely drained of life right at this moment.

Christopher had done all he could; he’d doused everything in alcohol, sewn you up as best he can, and placed a dressing over the wound to prevent infection. It was now up to your body which had already been weakened by the effects of giving birth beforehand, and as he leaves quietly he gives Samuel a comforting squeeze of his shoulder as he sits by your bedside utterly terrified. A few minutes later Mercy enters with the baby and stands by his side until he lifts his head to see what she needs.

“Yes Mercy?” he asks with an exhausted sigh.

“I’m so sorry Master Castell, the baby, he needs to suckle.”

“I… can she…?” he trails off, looking from your bosom to the hungry child in anguish.

“Master Castell, I made you some dinner, please eat and I shall try to get him to feed from Mistress Castell,” Mercy says quietly.

Samuel nods even though he didn’t want to eat a thing and slowly trudges out of the room to leave you with Mercy who gently places the baby down on the bed next to you and shuffles you up the pillows so she can bare your chest and hold the baby in place as he latches onto you for much needed nutrients.

“Is he-?” Samuel starts but stops when he sees your happy boy attached to your breast with his tiny fingers grabbing blindly at your skin.

“Would you like to hold him Master Castell?” Mercy asks, noticing the sheets that are stained with your blood.

“Yes,” he almost sobs, and Mercy carefully holds the baby in place until Samuel has a hold on the small child, watching in awe as he feeds from you.

Mercy fusses around the bed, carefully peeling off the bloody sheets and tugging your nightdress from your body so that she could clean you then put you into a fresh gown that was as clean as the new sheets.

“Thank you Mercy,” Samuel whispers as she rushes past him then back into the room.

“You’re very welcome Master Castell.”

“(Y/N) adores you and she would…” a sob cuts his sentence off and he turns his head away in embarrassment as Mercy finishes wiping your skin gently, “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologise for Master Castell, this is such a worrying time for you, but I know Mistress Castell will be okay.”

“How do you know that?” he asks with a smile.

“She’s strong and she loves you ever so much, God will not take her from you and the baby as love is so powerful.”

“That’s a really lovely thing to say Mercy, thank you.”

“You’re welcome Master Castell. I think baby is finished, shall I take him?”

“Yes please,” he nods, “I’d like to dress (Y/N) if that’s okay.”

“Of course.”

Mercy scoops up the little bundle from your chest then exits the room, leaving your new night gown over your bottom half, and Samuel picks it up before carefully lowering it over your head and lifting your body in sections so he can pull it down your full length until the scene of you laying in bed resembles complete normality instead of the bloody battlefield it had looked like earlier.

When night falls Samuel changes into his night shirt and curls up next to you, stroking your hair back from your face softly as his eyes stay fixed on your chest to make sure it doesn’t stop rising and falling with each breath you take, but eventually he slips into an uncomfortable sleep and wakes only a few hours later, just before the sun begins to rise above the horizon. He looks over at your body carefully and notices that you’d moved a little during the night, then he checks that your chest is still moving and he lets out a relieved sigh at the sight. The baby begins to cry and this seems to bring you back into consciousness as you mutter a groan and your head turns from side to side as if trying to figure out where the noise was coming from.

“(Y/N)?” Samuel asks hopefully, “(Y/N), I’m here sweetheart, I’m here!”

“Samuel?” you question groggily, “Samuel? Where’s Samuel?”

“I’m here my love,” he whispers.

“No… _Samuel,_ our baby.”

“He’s… I’ll fetch him!” Samuel grins, jumping out of bed and quickly going in to see Mercy, “she’s awake!”

“Take him to her!” Mercy laughs as she hands the baby over with tears already threatening to spill from her eyes with happiness.

“Here he is my love, here’s our Samuel,” he says proudly, carefully transferring him from his arms to yours, “we hadn’t named him before you fell ill yesterday… I wasn’t sure...”

“He would only ever be named after his father,” you smile, now sitting up in the bed as you cuddle your little boy against your chest tightly.

The grin on Samuel’s face only widens, “how are you feeling today?”

“Sore,” you grimace, “I’m not sure I can move much today. Did Christopher have to…?”

“Yes,” he nods solemnly, “he removed all the stones.”

“I’m so thankful to him,” you sigh, “I thought I was going to die.”

“You had too much to live for,” Samuel smiles.

You lift one of your hands to place it against his cheek and he immediately leans in to the comforting touch he’d been so desperate for since yesterday, then he turns his head to kiss your palm before moving your hand away from him so he can lean over and place a loving kiss against your dry lips before he moves down to little Samuel and his soft head.

“I’ll get Mercy to bring you some water. She was very worried about you but had Samuel feed last night while you were asleep.”

“Bless her soul, I shall wrap my free arm around her!” you chuckle.

Samuel walks out to fetch Mercy then watches from the doorway as she helps you sip from a cup before you pull her against your side with your free arm and hug her tightly as if she were family too.

“Oh Mercy, I am going to miss you so much when you find a husband and leave us!” you announce as you begin to cry, “you are a wonderful woman. I do love you so.”

“Mistress Castell,” she sobs, “please, you are too kind to me! You are the most perfect Mistress I could have ever asked for and I do love you too!”

There’s a faint knock at the door and Samuel turns away from you both with a smile to answer it and find Christopher standing the other side with his bag in hand.

“She’s awake!” he grins, then steps out of the house and shouts into the street, “she’s awake and we have a perfect son!”

People passing by laugh and give their congratulations, even James giving a nod in Samuel’s direction at the happy news, then Christopher walks through to check on you and the baby with a deeply relieved expression when he sees you sitting up and smiling.

“Christopher, I cannot thank you enough, you helped me bring little Samuel into the world then you saved my life. Thank you thank you!” you exclaim joyously.

“You really do not have to thank me,” he smiles, “I’m just glad that everything has worked out for the best. You seem well today and the wound has clotted as it should, I’m very pleased to see this; continue to progress like this and you will be up and about in no time.”

“Thank you again,” you say, placing your hand on his.

“You’re very welcome.”

The doctor leaves as Mercy perches herself on the end of your bed and Samuel sidles up next to you with an arm around your shoulders and the other stroking the baby’s head gently. It had been a long and bumpy trail to get where you were now but as you look around at the three people you love most in this world you realise that it was all worth it for this moment with your husband, child, and ever faithful friend.


End file.
